Envy is a feeling caused by failure or a perception of personal incompetence that is accompanied by sadness, frustration, and anger. not having and wanting to have something that the other has. This can lead to depression, anxiety and aggression combined with feelings of injustice.
Envy is a natural process at a time of child development. that’s why the feeling of envy can occur in childhood, when the child does not feel sufficiently loved by his parents and valued in relation to his siblings and friends. These feelings of lack and inferiority, combined with feelings of rivalry, are essential.
The problem is that these people they want to have or be like others without fighting or looking for strategies to achieve it. These are people who have generally had many failures throughout their lives.
Something essential is to accept yourself as you are with virtues and flaws, instead of being or appearing to others to mitigate envy; The envious are people who despise themselves very much, and the seriously jealous person also often despises others.
When the urge is exaggerated, the couple and their loved ones can be abused. Feelings of envy cause feelings of guilt; they are usually self-destructive and come back to the same person.
These people hide with supposedly positive reviews and with a desire to help, they also often disqualify the person they envy. It is a very harmful feeling when it occurs in the family environment. When a family member wants to seduce another family member, it’s usually because they want the other person to be the way they want to be.
There are factors in a society like ours which accentuate and even exalt the characteristics of envy, since if it’s not well seen but it’s not recognized either; There are also other elements to help recognize this, such as self-criticism, meditation, and self-analysis that help recognize your values and dispel envy.
Moreover, envy brings comfort to people. Thus, extreme craving can make the person feeling it sick.
They exist different levels of feelings of envy.
People who feel it lightly and manage to control that desire to own or be what other people have.
People who want the person to stop having what the other has at all costs.
People who seize the property of others they envy usually cause family and even social problems that can even end up in prison.
Related article: “About happiness: what do we all seek?”
What to do to overcome the craving?
Envy is not always bad or not always a negative factor, because eIts itself can help us grow if we know how to channel it.
Of course, the first thing that is needed to deal with the urge is to recognize it and analyze the reasons why they have that feeling. It is very difficult to recognize the feeling of envy, It is generally in therapy that we recognize that behind the depression hide feelings of envy that are poorly managed..
If one person imitates another, it is a cause for warning, and we can explore whether it is positive or negative feelings that can help the envious person overcome.
To recognize an envious person, we can consider some basic warning signs: Envy problems occur mostly in people who are dissatisfied with our successes and show a lot of competitiveness and competition instead of sharing and enjoying what has been achieved.
One way to deal with this phenomenon is to focus on personal growth instead of paying attention to what other people are and have.
Sometimes envy can be a major driver of growth, but it can still produce anxiety, anger and pain.
Low self-esteem, insecurity, and misunderstood narcissism can cause feelings of envy and instead we may try to be grateful for what we ourselves have accomplished.
Enjoying life instead of seeing how others enjoy it It is a key factor for growth and for avoiding feelings of envy. It is important to be flexible and not have a high level of autonomy and frustration tolerance.
And on social media…
Facebook and Instagram help a lot to create envy. We see how friends and even strangers progress, even have fun without anything that is published being true. They often show how they dress, how they comb their hair, what they buy, what trips they take, feeding the fantasy that the other is having better fun than them. We can all feel this feeling, which is why marketers achieve greater advertising impact by harnessing the potential of envy, and it is also used in politics and sales.
Idealization is very common on social media and has to do with what we expect of ourselves; but we believe that it is not possible to attain it, and therefore we see it and desire it in the other. That’s why it’s useful try not to compare yourself to others and learn to value what you have by working for yourself and not for others.
The way to deal with envy on social media is to first consider that much of what we see and read is utopianand examine how we are affected by what you see and read, and how it affects your self-esteem, then start unfollowing those people who stir up negative emotions in you.
I suggest going to psychotherapy if you feel like this to help you recognize your feelings and also to increase your self-esteem, overcoming feelings of inferiority.