Sexual dysfunctions are all those situations in which sexual satisfaction or sexual response is affected and this prevents them from engaging in a desired sexual relationship. They affect both men and women and do not have to be associated with age or sexual orientation.
Our sexuality is valued, albeit in a private and intimate way, as one of the most important aspects of our life. However, it is well known that throughout history, human sexuality has been a nest of taboos, prejudice and censorship.
The repression of sexuality, not good, the curb on desire and generalized ignorance on the subject not only mean that we cannot know, express and enjoy our sexuality to the fullest, but often cause the appearance of more serious difficulties. that prevent us from doing so. pleasure and that harm our relationships, both as a couple and socially, because they affect self-esteem and general satisfaction with life.
Although the statistics are confusing, due to the disagreement that generally exists in the classification of sexual dysfunctions, they indicate a fairly high prevalence. Masters and Johnson, pioneers of human sexuality research in the 1960s, reported that 50% of heterosexual couples had some form of sexual dysfunction.
Currently, according to the Andalusian Institute of Sexology and Psychology (2002), the most frequently seen sexual dysfunction is erectile dysfunction, which covers 48% of consultations. Premature ejaculation is followed by 28.8%, followed by hypoactive sexual desire (8%), female anorgasmia (7.4%), vaginismus (1.6%) and male orgasm disorders (0.4%).
How do I know if I have sexual dysfunction?
The moment when you feel uncomfortable or dissatisfied with your sexual behavior. For me the dysfunction begins when it is the person themselves who is not comfortable in their relationships, Not when the body does not respond as society tells it to respond (Ex .: “A real man endures more than X times”, if you are happy with your ejaculation time and your partner too, it there is sexual dysfunction that is worth the trouble). In other words, it is a subjective perception.
How it interferes with the quality of life
Our body is a means of pleasure. If it doesn’t work out the way we would like it to be, that pleasure will be overwhelmed, and Doesn’t pleasure offer a quality of life in all respects? If our sex is not giving us satisfaction, we will stop maintaining it, while many studies say that one of the variables associated with sexual satisfaction is how often they have it, for both men and women. women.
In addition, as it is evident, not only the relationship between the couple in bed deteriorates, but also self-confidence, self-esteem deteriorates and in the case of a stable partner, communication with them and general satisfaction with the relationship is also detrimental.
As usual, but not the best choice, sexual problems are usually experienced in silence. This only generates serious internal conflicts (and with the partner), consequently reducing the quality of life.
Why treatment is important
Sexual dysfunctions often become a vicious cycle. It starts with having an episode where our body didn’t react the way we wanted it to (lost or didn’t have an erection, suddenly didn’t feel like having sex, can’t reach climax or ejaculate sooner than I would like).
The next intercourse already goes away with some anticipatory anxiety in the body lest it happen again; this anxiety is what keeps the body from functioning again. So until you stop trying (“total, I’m not going to enjoy” or “total, why should I try if I don’t understand?” Or “I’m useless” or “I want to satisfy- / and I can’t ”). Anyway, you are entering a loop that is very difficult to get out of and for which you need, in the vast majority of cases, therapeutic help.
Talking about sexuality issues produces very complex emotions such as guilt, shame or failure. This is why many people and couples find it difficult to take the plunge into therapy.
We know that it is very difficult, on the one hand, to accept that you have a problem that is usually embarrassing for yourself and for others to admit, and on the other hand, dare to ask for help. Many couples spend an average of 3 years without talking about resolving the problem and spend 5 years before going to therapy.
The main reason it’s important to treat them is that bed problems cause emotional pain (and physical pain in some dysfunctions) that can affect your self-esteem and overall quality of life. It’s important that you don’t let the emotions we talked about before take hold of you and do not let them end this vicious cycle, because it is precisely they who feed it.
- Toquero de la Torre, F., Zarco Rodríguez, J., Cabell-Santamaría, F., Alcoba Valls, S., García-Giralda Ruiz, L. and Sant Martí Blanco, C. (2004). Guide to good clinical practice in sexual dysfunction. Madrid: Collegiate medical organization.