10 tips to say goodbye to him (even if you still love him)

In the world of interpersonal relationships, especially in the world of couples, there are difficult times that we have to go through.. One of them is when we’re having unrequited love or when we’re in a relationship and know it’s time to say goodbye because we’ve tried everything and the thing isn’t working.

These situations can create great suffering and staying there can be devastating. For this reason, even if no one likes to say goodbye to someone they love, sometimes it’s the best option.

When to say goodbye is an opportunity to grow

Goodbyes can be very hard, and even more so when you know that you will never see that person you loved so much again, and that you are aware that nothing will ever be the same and that over time the connection. that never existed will disappear.

But there are times when saying goodbye is an opportunity to grow, and also an opportunity to reorient our lives to the path we desire, because when love is not reciprocated, obstacles along the way can be. too big to be followed on this path. In these cases, we need to be smart and take the right path, the one that allows us to be ourselves again and leads us to our well-being.

And they say it might sound selfish, but it’s even worse to stay on this path where the other person will be selfish with us at one point or another, because when we don’t feel the same and the relationship is not fair. When a relationship starts to be toxic, we have to lose if or if.

The decision to say goodbye can be difficult, but in this context, it is without a doubt the least bad option.. Although at the time of the farewells it seems the world is coming to an end, the truth is, it’s a way to close a stage and start a new one. The one that will allow us to grow, and from which we can take advantage of this initial pain to be more than who we are and to develop as people.

Say goodbye even though there is still love

Even though we clearly know that we have to say goodbye to this person we love so much, it is not always easy to move. In the following lines, we give you some tips for saying goodbye even if you still love.

1. Understand the situation and don’t rush

Saying goodbye to someone we want shouldn’t be the result of an impulsive act, but should be meditation and reflection. This means that the situation must be understood and seen objectively. And when it is clear that staying in this situation, the only thing it will cause is pain, you better let it go. Now there are always other options before this one. For example, go for dialogue or go to couples therapy if you want to save the relationship. however, there are times when farewell is inevitable, and then all that remains is to say goodbye..

2. Be realistic

If you’ve ever given yourself a deadline for things to change and it hasn’t, tried to talk and things aren’t improving, don’t be fooled: people don’t. don’t change if they don’t want to change, so staying in this relationship longer will only hurt you.

3. Make sure you really want to do it

Not to rush – it’s to be really sure that the decision we are going to make is the right one. Once you are clear and have weighed the pros and cons of your decision, you can move on..

4. Be honest

When you’re about to say goodbye, you need to be honest. But not only with the other person, but also with ourselves. Face-to-face is the best option, although many people find it difficult to talk about their feelings and express what they really mean..

5 be respectful

If you are honest you should also be respectful. Therefore, it is possible to say things clearly without your hurtful tone. Being assertive is a great virtue, and being able to present your views will always be to your advantage. Now, you have to be respectful to the other person as well, and if they don’t want to be with you, you have to understand that this is something that is happening and that you have to accept.

6. Find the right time

It is always good to look for the right time to speak and, if possible, to say it face to face. Now, if that’s not possible, try to make the message respectful and expose how you feel. You can send email or WhatsApp if the other person can’t stay with you.

7. Be consistent

It is clear that the message to this person, if it is sincere, will express your deepest feelings despite your goodbyes.. But you have to remember the situation that caused you to say goodbye, and you have to stick with the idea that is over. Don’t be fooled, because if the person doesn’t want to be with you, they won’t. Once you’ve expressed yourself, it’s consistent with what you said. If it’s goodbye, it’s goodbye.

8. Close the door

You’re probably going to want the other person to swear undying love to you after the word, but this rarely happens.. If you’ve pondered the decision, you’ve done the right thing. Don’t leave the door open with phrases like “see you soon” because what happens in the future will be seen later. Although hope is the last thing you lose, you don’t have to feed it. To overcome this situation, you must stick to the premise of “all or nothing” or “with you or without you”. If in the future you return to the relationship to be good friends, it will be because this is how you wanted it and how you feel.

9. Understand that the road will not be easy

It often happens that after expressing your feelings, you will experience a certain comfort and a sensation of catharsis. However, leaving someone you love behind is one of the most difficult experiences we can have.. Lovelessness is a process that isn’t linear, but there will be days with ups and downs that you want to cry in and others that you want to give way to anger. It’s part of the process, so understand – and move on to the decision you’ve made.

10. Don’t run away from your emotions and give yourself time

If you feel like crying, do it. Take a moment of the day to get rid of that person less than the beginning, but over time you will regain stability and stay alive. If you would like to know more about how to cope with this situation, you can read our article “The 5 Phases to Overcome the Grief of Breakup”.

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