Much has been written about married life, and that’s not surprising; living with the person you love is much more complex than it seems, partly because of the intensity of the emotions involved in this process and the expectations they arouse.
In this article, we will go over several keys to living as a couple and make the day go smoothly without unnecessary discussions. Additionally, we’ll go over the concept of a couple, explaining what it means to play this role.
What is love in a relationship?
Getting involved in a relationship is above all knowing how to share intimacy, even if that seems paradoxical. When we start a relationship with someone, we will not only share our virtues with them, but we will also have to learn to live with these people in our comfort zone without the company of the person we love having a negative effect. about our activities. It is important to know how to be present while respecting the space of the other, Both in marriage and in a courtly relationship.
Another important aspect of knowing how to live as a couple is communication: we must be good communicators to achieve understanding and to avoid misunderstandings or the creation of unfulfilled expectations.
When we first started dating officially, it’s important to keep in mind that they had a life before they met us: a stage where they probably have. personal projects and goals have arisen to realize that they are foreign to our existence.
Thus, the ideal is that we can help our partner to realize his projects, by motivating him and by understanding that there are other important aspects in the life of a person beyond the emotional bond which unites you. The same goes for us, we must not neglect our personal aspirations.
Tips for living together as a couple
In the lines, we will see some practical tips that they are effective in living with our partner and maintaining a relationship of love and respect.
1. Being able to live without the partner
The first point concerns the ability to remain functional even when we are not physically close to our sentimental partner; otherwise we would experience excessive emotional behavior which is counterproductive for a healthy life together.
2. The principles are not negotiable
From the outset, it is good to clarify that our moral principles should not be negotiated, but respected, And the same goes for those of the other person. A healthy coexistence arises from accepting the ideals of the other, although these are not shared by the husband, wife, groom or bride.
3. Love in freedom
Healthy relationships are not possessive, quite the contrary. The desire of the other to be happy transcends the desire to possess, Which implies that we do not act to retain this person, but so that our presence brings happiness, and his to bring it to us.
If you’re happy around her, great, but if you don’t want to be here anymore, it doesn’t make sense to be forced into it – it’s something that works both ways.
4. Grow your own garden
This metaphor invites us that instead of striving to please our partner, we strive more to be a kind person to ourselves. When we are dedicated to cultivating and improving our most basic habits, improving relationships with establishing a healthier coexistence is nothing more than one of the consequences of our personal development.
5. Equality above all
A healthy couple living together must above all be egalitarian. Where some have more advantages than others, things end badly. Ideally, there should be a healthy balance between the demands of both members of the couple.
6. Encourage mutual compensation
It is important that the members of the couple manage to compensate each other. In other words, instead of attributing the other person’s faults, these limitations should be supplemented by support if necessary (Provided that these limitations do not involve physical or psychological aggression and violence).
This shows a good level of empathy in the couple, because it is proof that by living together, these people are able to put themselves in the place of the loved one.
7. Avoid apologizing for the drama
Often, couples think that the more complicated the relationship, the more meaningful it is. Eto is nothing more than a myth without any foundation.
The truth is that the more drama there is in the relationship, the more likely it is that a dysfunctional dynamic will occur in this love story.
8. Promote assertive communication
A key to achieving a good coexistence within the couple is learn to communicate confidently, Expressing our desires and feelings in language of mutual respect and making sure that our words will not hurt our partner, but without leaving anything relevant in the inkwell.
9. Beware of “forever”
The romantic thought that your relationship will be for life is often counterproductive and the only thing that is achieved with it is to generate anxiety within the relationship.
It is better to live the moments and enjoy your relationship within the framework of mutual respect, without idealizing the couple, Nor exaggerate with future plans. Try to stay focused on the here and now.
10. Don’t assume that your interests match ours
Relationships should always provide an opportunity for each person to express their disagreement. That’s why it’s important checking frequently to know the other person is comfortable with routines and habits of coexistence that you have adopted. Just the fact that you have adopted these roles for a long time is not an argument in favor of them.
- Capafons, JI and Sosa, CD (2009). Dealing with relationship issues. 1a. ed. Madrid: Pyramid Editions.
- Fehr, B., Russell, J. (1991). The concept of love seen from the point of view of a prototype. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
- O’Donohue, W. and Ferguson, KE (2006). Evidence-based practice in psychology and behavior analysis. The behavior analyst today.
- Shaver, PR, Wu, S. and Schwartz, JC (1992). Intercultural similarities and differences in emotions and their representation: a prototype approach.