Relationship problems are the main source of discomfort for many people around the world, this is why psychologists tend to frequently face this type of crisis.
This is so because it is common to experience difficulties in romantic relationships: to the problems posed by privacy that affect our relationship with the loved one, are added the setbacks that occur in the relationship itself. .
In this article, we will take a look at which aspects of our life influence how we experience our partner’s problems and what can be done from a psychological intervention to resolve them.
How do relationship problems arise? main factors
There are a myriad of reasons dating issues can arise., Since each person is unique. However, in general, it is possible to identify a number of factors that particularly influence the probabilities of experiencing such conflicts. They are as follows.
1. Personality style
In general, it is not true that having very different personalities is beneficial for the couple. In fact, if this factor has an impact on the health of the relationship, it is negative (at least statistically). It is easier to get to a point where there is a conflict of priorities and motivations if the two members of the relationship are too different.
In addition, no matter how similar the two people are, they adopt a pattern of behavior that corresponds to a personality of strong neuroticismThey also tend to experience more problems in their relationships and marriage. That’s not to say they’re predestined to fail in their love life or that they can’t learn to regulate their actions so they can be with someone, of course. Simply, they usually have a little more trouble.
2. Values and beliefs
Talking about values and beliefs can seem very abstract, but they really do have an effect on the health of relationships. See how the person we love behaves in a way that clashes with our value system, in the long run, it can generate resentment, blame and discussion, Especially if these values have to do with the romantic relationship in a very direct way.
3. Lack of time together
We must not forget that love does not appear in nothingness: it must be constantly nourished by the time spent in the company of the groom, the bride, the husband or the wife.
It is sometimes tricky, especially if there are family reconciliation problems due to poor working conditions. However, at other times what fails is the quantity, but the quality of the time spent under one roof. Boredom and monotony can cause the only type of meaningful interaction between members of a relationship to be discussions.
4. Communication problems
Lack of communication is also one of the common reasons for relationship problems. These cause misunderstandings and moments of ambiguity which eventually lead to frustration and irritability., And even in the event of serious coordination errors.
5. Sexual difficulties
Many problems in intimate and sexual life have a psychological origin. For example, it is very common for insecurity to cause not only dissatisfaction in this aspect of life, but even self-esteem issues and taboos.
Infidelity is another common problem for couples who see a psychologist. This is why, in many cases, what psychologists do is investigate the history of the relationship, to see if there have been any episodes of infidelity and if there may be any. old grudges, which are not always communicated directly during the early stages of psychological intervention. .
Another problematic factor that we see the most in psychology sessions with patients is conflicts of excessive jealousy. Insecurity and the feeling that the court or marriage can be broken at any time through the intervention of a third person, they can cause a lot of anguish both to those who experience jealousy in their own flesh and to the other member of the couple, who feels controlled.
Anxiety and stress they don’t have to be about what happens when you’re in a relationship with the person you love (in fact, they usually have to do with what’s going on at work or with health issues), but of course, this affects the emotional development of the couple. It is therefore one of the aspects to which psychologists attach the most importance during the consultation.
How does a psychologist work to help couples in crisis?
We have already seen the most common types of original couple problems; now let’s see how we work from psychology to provide a solution to these cases. The good news is that the chances of getting significant improvements in strength and satisfaction levels are high, about 80% of the time.
Psychological professionals work with each member of the relationship individually, as well as with the partner as a whole on a global scale, to detect the contexts and situations that support and fuel the partner’s crisis.
Then, from this information, we intervene both on the ideas and beliefs of the patients, and on their habits, so that they are able to interpret what is happening to them more constructively and at the same time, find ways to embrace healthier relationships. All this, after identifying each patient’s personality styles, each person’s goals and motivations, their problematic or potentially beneficial behavior patterns, etc.
In short, solving partner problems involves internalizing new habits both cognitively (ideas and beliefs) and behavioral (ways of interacting with the environment and with others); in this way, the two dimensions of the psychological reinforce each other in oneself and in the person one loves, and the passage from a love crisis to a new phase of mutual discovery is possible.