To be an ‘amateur’ or a ‘lover’ in love

Burning heart and fuzzy thinking. insomnia Sometimes we find it difficult to put our own condition into words.

Some don’t love themselves so much, but love the act of loving. So, no matter who you love and you can change, the lover can “flirt”, because, ultimately, he loves no one but himself, he only loves the fact of “to be in love”.

    The search for love resemblance

    When you find your “soul mate”, you meet another person because you are alike; they have the same tastes, the same rejections, they like the same places, the same series, the same films and the same music. It’s a question of attraction in my opinion.

    But all this also hurts love, because to love the other only because he is like me would be in a very primitive and narcissistic relationship. Instead of leaning towards the other person, we lean towards ourselves. I will thus love myself twice, in the other and in myself. It is a love that revolves only around itself. There is no delivery.

      The attraction of opposites

      There is also the “attraction of opposites”, which usually expressed with the phrase “we complement each other very well”.

      It can become a false form of love, as I seek what I miss in the other, as I am incomplete and need to transform into a complete unity. A perfect person, who lacks nothing. In short, there too, we love each other.

      Common Mistakes

      The positive aspects of a person, such as their physique, talents and women, economic and/or social status, they must not be the cause of a feeling of love. The person must be loved for what he is and not for what he has. Loving someone for who they are generates admiration and adoration. Lovers choose parts of the person, true lovers choose the whole person.

      Friendship can endure the distance of time and space, two friends who stop seeing each other for a moment, reunite and pick up the conversation where they left off some time ago. Love, on the other hand, finds it difficult to endure distance and physical absence.. Hugs, caresses, caresses, orgasms are body needs.

      Love can lead us to encounters without dialogue or, on the contrary, to live together and believe that we are one. In the first case, love decays and suffers, and in the second, there is no longer anyone to love, nor anyone to love.

        There is no one who is “made” for the other

        It is in the space of endless absence that a romantic encounter takes place. It happens miraculously. We consider lucky those who experience this encounter that occurs, purely by chance.

        The instinct of love pushes us to envelop our bodies. On the other hand, pure love, apart from sexuality, love for what the person is, is a greater love. After pure love, we would already speak of a mystical infatuation, bordering on madness.

        Love is linked to desire, because as it is it never ends. There is never anything that really turns it off.

          Outer love and inner love

          Loving everyone is the best way to love yourself, and fundamentally, to love no one. If one thinks of his own good, before that of the other, then it is not love. The lover gives and does not expect to receive. A lot of self-love hinders the possibility of loving the other. There is no place for the other. He would then be an amateur who takes shelter in his power, in his pleasure and savors his solitude, the treasure, like gold. He prefers to bear, only, his own pressures, before agreeing something with the other.

          To be in love, you have to put aside arrogance, self-sufficiency, self-interest. The lover makes the other shine, removes his fears, gives him strength, makes him more desirable, underlines his intelligence, believes in his abilities and encourages him. He is also nervous, stormy, insecure, goes through shouting, says and directs and reconciliations, constantly negotiates, calms down, and explodes again. A lover loves everything in the other.

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