What is preventing infidelity from appearing in a relationship?

Even though our conception of what a healthy love story is has improved over the past few decades, that doesn’t mean that love life has ceased to be full of imperfections. Infidelity is one of the most common, for example.

In fact, to date, it is estimated that extramarital affairs are the most common reason for divorceAnd it’s no surprise that research shows that around 4% of people with a partner surveyed report having been unfaithful in the past 12 months.

Taking this into account, What prevents infidelity in some couples? Let’s see.

    Theories on what keeps a relationship strong

    In a recent study published in The Journal of Sex Research, a team of researchers set out to detect which factors they prevent couples from falling into the temptation of infidelity.

    To do this, they tested the validity of a number of theories that attempt to explain how people with partners behave in contexts in which, if they wanted to, they could have such adventures. These theories, which have been trying for years to understand what is the glue that binds people together in romantic relationships, are as follows.

    Moral theory

    For example, according to the theory based on morality, beliefs about what is good and bad in a relationship, they would have a determining weight in the actions of those who are married or not in a situation of celibacy. Of course, morality seems to carry a weight in the love life, because in practically cultures, the relations outside the couple are regarded as something which speaks badly about who commits these acts.

      Theories of economists

      On the other hand, economic theories suggest that people who have a love affair they think rationally about costs and benefits which means being in a relationship with a specific person, with all the sacrifices and the management of time and effort that this entails.

      It is taken for granted that all people who have invested in a relationship for a long time, or who believe they can benefit greatly from continuing the one they have recently started, will be less likely to have relationships outside of it. or at the very least will require other potential couples to contribute much more than the current one to make the infidelity worth it.

      evolutionary theory

      Evolutionary psychology tends to emphasize the role that genetics and in general the inheritance passed from generation to generation influences the behavior of individuals, and in the case of the psychosexual context, these patterns of behavior are generally described in terms of differences between men. and women. The reason is that, if it is taken into account the influence of evolution on sexual behaviorThen, the fact of belonging to one or the other sex must influence the “starting point” from which each one judges a possible option of this type.

      Usually, men are described as people who place more importance on quantity than quality, while in women the opposite is given, and they would value more the possibility of being with one. partner who brings stability and emotional commitment. The reason why this idea has been defended by evolutionary psychology is not based on the existence of stereotypes about differences between the sexes, but of a genetic inheritance fruit of opportunities and costs which, by the way, would occur in many other species of living things.

      In this perspective, females, having a limited number of eggs and having to be pregnant and therefore “vulnerable” for a long time, must ensure that they are going to conceive. Count on the collaboration of a couple engaged in the task of helping to provide the material goods necessary for the survival of the family as well as for protection.

      Males, on the other hand, are said to have less reproductive value. since biologically their commitment to raising a family is less, so their concerns would be more focused on not raising the offspring of another individual (women, by forming embryos, have a much easier time knowing who is his offspring and who is not.).

      Thus, from an evolutionary standpoint, men should be more likely to be unfaithful, while being more concerned about the possibility of their partner making direct sexual contact with other people, while women would be more concerned about being unfaithful. possibility that their couple has an emotional connection with another person.

      On the other hand, monogamy would limit for both sexes, as in the case of men, the variety of possible sexual partners decreases to a minimum and, in the case of women, this prevents them from investing in other potential relationships that may be worth more. The possibility of forming a fixed community around them, whether it be a family or a surrogate, would be an aspect which would contribute to the unity of these relations once they were formed.

        Factors that prevent the onset of infidelity

        Based on the above explanations, the researchers created a 34-item questionnaire and administered it to 110 people aged 24 to 60, married for at least 2 years, with at least one son or daughter in the family. continuation of this relationship. The questions of this questionnaire referred to elements that, personally, each individual could value as aspects allowing to avoid infidelity on his part.

        The results show that aspects that most help prevent infidelity they are moral standards, the consequences that infidelity would have on sons and daughters, the fear of being alone and the effects that cheating would have on the other member of the couple.

        In addition, the data obtained reflects, to some extent, that evolutionary ideas come true, but only in a very timid manner. Men are a little more likely to commit infidelity because children’s well-being and moral aspects carry more weight for women.

          Bibliographical references:

          • Ziv, I., Lubin, OB and Asher, S. (2017). “I swear I will never betray you”: factors reported by spouses that help them resist extramarital sex in relation to sex, length of marriage and religiosity, The Journal of Sex Research. DOI: 10.1080 / 00224499.2017.1347602

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