Falling in love is always something of a mystery, as it comes across as a deeply irrational and emotional phenomenon. It appears suddenly, several times without our being able to predict it, and that changes everything: as much as we behave, from which we perceive what is happening to us.
But something as strange as the desire to form a couple bond is the end of this emotional impulse. The question of why love ends is not easy to answerBeing an emotion-based phenomenon, it is not based on ideas or beliefs, static and relatively easy to study, but on a combination of unpredictable neural activity, hormones and interaction with the environment and with those who inhabit it.
However, it is possible to identify different elements that influence the chances of ending love. We will talk about it in this article.
Why does love end?
Love is one of the human dimensions that has aroused the most interest over the centuries, inspiring all kinds of research and explanatory proposals in both the arts and the sciences. No wonder how it can become one of the main sources of motivation and meaning for our lives.
Naturally, a lot of these questions are about how falling in love arises, that phase of life in which you seem to stop being yourself and start thinking about something bigger than yourself, the couple. However, it is also important to ask yourself what causes love to end. In a way, seeing what can weaken or even kill that bond of love tells us in retrospect what the true nature of those feelings was.
Now my love it is a complex phenomenon because there is an almost unlimited number of situations that lead to it. Not falling in love is what is given by default, which we have all been in, so in practice almost any setting we live in relatively well is likely to show love. However, once he has fallen in love, it is easier to identify the main causes of the love goal ”. Let’s see what they are.
1. It was just falling in love
As strange as it may sound, loving and falling in love are not the same. The second is a much more timely and short-lived phenomenon than it usually lasts no more than a few months, between four and six, While love lasts much longer.
The basic difference between the two is that falling in love is based on a certain tension based on uncertainty about what will happen to the other person and, in general, ignorance of what it is. In practice, this means that we idealize it.
It is therefore relatively common that when falling in love fades, and with that goes idealization, Don’t be in love. In these cases, the relationship was probably based on the expectation of having a relationship with an idealized version of the lover.
2. Poor living conditions
The idea that love can do anything is a myth. Love, like all psychological phenomena, is related to context, and if the situation in which we live is not conducive, the bond of love will weaken.
One of the clearest examples of this situation concerns difficult working conditions. If you have to work long hours and put a lot of effort into itIt will be more difficult to spend time with the couple, and this will generate a clear wear and tear that in the long run can end the relationship.
Love always involves significant sacrifices, such as having less time for yourself, investing in common expenses, or being more exposed to conflict situations.
This wear and tear, which is guaranteed, can be combined with a feeling of monotony which, in the case of living as a couple, is more noticeable, because by living with another person there are fewer excuses for living each day. same habits. , same routines. It should be a lifestyle in which opportunities arise to do new things togetherBut this does not always happen and it is very frustrating.
And it is that living in the monotony of celibacy can be seen as something over which you have more control, but if it comes up in the context of a romantic relationship, the feeling that nothing is going to get better and that l boredom is part of the “contract” that unites these two people becomes very obvious. Expectations of change for the better are losing strength, And with them can also go the excitement for the relationship.
4. Communication problems
Living with the partner makes it very easy to transform communication problems into serious problems that end up telling. If significant misunderstandings are generated and these are not handled in the right way, one can fuel a state of suspicion and paranoia that totally goes against the logic of what should be a fluid emotional relationship and functional.