70 questions for teenagers (to get to know each other better)

Adolescence is a stage of change, disruptive for both parents and children. No wonder the relationship with our children becomes something purely formal, an exchange of a few words per day limited to concise monosyllabic questions and answers: “How did your instinct go today?” “Well.” “Nothing more?” “No.”

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing every day, over and over again, and expecting different results. Why did we ask them the same thing every day? They’re not going to answer us again, no matter how much we insist on them.

If what we want is to have a fluid conversation with our children, in which we arouse their interest in the most varied subjects, it is better to change the strategy a little.

Then we will see several questions for teenagers perfect for talking about much deeper and more interesting subjects and thus breaking a little with the monotony.

    Table of Contents

    70 questions for teens to connect with as parents

    Below we’ll see 70 questions for teens, along with some comments.

    1. What do you think is the most embarrassing thing your parent has done?

    A question that not all parents want to ask but necessary to know our relationship with our child. It’s possible that we already did something our teenager didn’t like at all, making him look bad in front of other classmates. It could also just be something that makes him laugh.

    Either way, this will allow us to work with him on the meaning of the ridiculous.

    2. How would you describe your parents’ way of educating?

    There are strict parents and more cowardly parents. Everyone, as long as they do not rub shoulders with abuse or irresponsibility, have their reasons for applying their educational style. However, the way parents educate and the perception of their children can be very different, and it doesn’t always have to work as intended.

    3. What music groups do you listen to now?

    We are going to dive in a lake which in most teenagers is usually very personal, but at the same time they like to talk about it. But beware! we don’t try to laugh at ourselves and start listening to their own music because they may think we meddle with their tastes which can do more harm than good.

    We can ask him to put on one of his favorite songs, to know what kind of genre he likes, the style …

    4. Who do you think is your best friend?

    It’s a great way to get to know our own kids because, surprisingly as it sounds, we don’t know most of their friends. You might be embarrassed to introduce yourself or to be us about what you are ashamed of.

    5. Who is your favorite teacher and what is the worst thing about you?

    Perhaps his preference for one or the other teacher is due to the subject he teaches or the way he teaches it. All adolescents have favorite subjects, and in all of them the figure of a teacher ends up being very popular, while in the less favorite the teacher is not so lucky.

    6. What series do you like to watch and which would you recommend?

    We all have shows that we love, whether it’s love, documentaries, action, etc. Some of them may not be suitable for your age, but they are still fine know what kind of entertainment you like.

    7. Do you think aliens exist?

    Of course, this question is really striking and unexpected in a normal father-to-son conversation, but it really does give a lot to think about. Maybe it’s sci-fi, mystery, or just explaining that the universe is too big for us to be alone, of course this conversation isn’t going to be all about an “I don’t know”. There is a lot of debate on this issue and it can be a very interesting way to strengthen the parent-child bond.

    8. How masculine or feminine do you feel?

    This question should be asked very thoughtfully. The concepts of masculinity and femininity are social constructs, imposed by culture. The idea of ​​a man and a woman is not a bad thing, but it should be noted that being a woman or a woman is not less man nor less woman, an idea that many teenagers have. much better established. than their “baby boomer” parents.

    Whatever our child is feeling, this is of course a conversation that lends itself to much debate. In any family where you want to raise a happy son or daughter, you have to accept him as he is, knowing that everyone is born as they are and that sexual orientation is not a disease. mental or something modifiable.

      9. How would you describe the personality of your father or mother? How identified do you feel?

      Personality has a hereditary component, there is no doubt about it. Much research suggests that this is so. Additionally, the fact that we were raised from an early age with our parents means that anything that is not inherited by genes can be inherited through vicarious learning.

      Many teens, at this difficult stage in their lives, seem to want to move away from what their parents are, “very caring floaters”, and begin to behave drastically the opposite of what they do, or believe, who do, their parents. It’s here that, as parents we can explain to him how he looks like usLike many things he thinks we never really did, we did them to annoy our parents too.

      10. Is “bullying” a problem in your school?

      It is a crude problem, but it must be dealt with in every family. Bullying is a serious problem in our society, responsible for anxiety disorders, depression and suicide.

      The victim may feel terribly underestimated not only by their bullies, but also by those closest to them, who have failed to identify the problem. It is for this reason that it is very important to tackle it at home and determine if our child is a victim, a witness or even a “bully”. The best way is to understand and give visibility to the problem, to identify it and prevent it from going any further.

      11. What are the first things you remember?

      The memory can be very fuzzy, but some of his fondest and early childhood will be remembered. This is the perfect time to bring back beautiful memories, approach them in a more adult way and give you new information about what it was like, so that you know how it has evolved from the moment it came into the world until to the turbulent adolescence.

      12. What would you change about your parents?

      This question is a little complex, but surely our child has complaints about the way we behave, even if we do it with the best intention in the world. In this life you can always improve yourself, and in fact, it is to make our child feel as happy as possible, growing up well.

      13. What motivates you the most?

      Although the formal exchange of words that usually takes place in the morning or just arriving from class between father and son gives the adolescent the impression that the adolescent has no motivation, the truth is that adolescents, like anyone else. who else in any other age group, they have a lot of tastes and preferences related to their lifestyle.

      Whether it’s playing the guitar, wanting to be a doctor, going on a trip wherever you are, there are many things our son or daughter would love to do.

      These motivations, once discovered by adults, can lead to activities together, like fulfilling that long-awaited but never accomplished trip or buying a guitar and practicing. Who knows, maybe we have discovered a hidden talent.

      14. What do you think is your ideology?

      Even to our eyes, teens may seem too young, the truth is that in their capers is already beginning to form a way of seeing the world and what they understand as an ideal society, that is to say a political ideology.

      It is more or less between 12 and 14 years that he begins to draw the first sketches of what will end up being his thought. We have to be careful, because it is possible that our son or our daughter has a very opposite view of us, although this is not surprising.

      15. Is there something in your body that you are not comfortable with?

      We humans are not perfect and because of the media we always have a certain complex. These complexes can be especially hard in the teenage years, as it is a time when we constantly compare ourselves with others, seeing that our chest is small, that we don’t have a lot of muscles, or that we are big.

      This is important to address, because in the event that the teenager has serious self-esteem issues, we might be faced with a possible psychological issue, which can perfectly evolve into an obsession with thinness or muscularity. This can turn into thrones like anorexia, bulimia or vigor. All bodies, as long as they are healthy, are acceptable and beautiful.

      16. What do you do and what do you think when you see a homeless person?

      Homeless people are not on the streets for fun. Many have suffered very miserable lives, with physical and mental abuse. Others are on the streets because they are bankrupt and have become addicted to various drugs.

      The last thing they need is to be criminalized and treated as if they were garbage. Debating this question can be a great exercise in working on emotional intelligence and empathy.

      17. How do you think the world will end?

      Have fun and think a bit about a future that hopefully is far away. Maybe the aliens will invade us, the Sun will absorb the Earth, there will be a nuclear war or just a virus will end capitalism and therefore our civilization. It’s true that it’s a bit of a disturbing question, but it’s okay to talk about bad things every now and then, it keeps the conversation alive.

      18. What do you envy in your friends’ family?

      Each family is special. There are some families where a weekly payment is made while in others the parents insist to their children that they should be grateful for the shelter and the food they give them.

      Educational methods and how to pamper adolescents vary from family to family, and of course it can cause envy. It is important to work and understand what our child wants from others.

      19. Do you think those of your generation are really different from what other generations are?

      The “millennials” or generation I, that is to say born between the seventies and the middle of the nineties, are already adults. Many of us already have children. The current generation of teenagers are the Zs, those born after 1997, also known as post-millennials.

      While there aren’t many noticeable differences from Millennials, it’s true that today’s teens have highly digitized behavior patterns compared to the previous generation. Instagram, Skype and Twitter are like eating or sleeping for the Z: needs.

      These social networks have helped to change our way of thinking, which is updated in real time. That is why it is not uncommon to find differences in issues such as gender fluidity or exposure to RR.SS.

      20. What do you think adults don’t understand about teenagers?

      “It’s just that they don’t understand me.” “They don’t know what I’m going through” “Oh, my parents are tanks” and things like that are very common in the minds of teenagers. But what do they mean exactly? What are they complaining about?

      Adolescent psychology is too complex and broad a topic to discuss here, but it’s clear that teens always have something they don’t agree with their parents about. Speaking of which, being in a relaxed and calm atmosphere can be interesting as they can help resolve misperceptions or self-criticism in adulthood.

      21. Would you have liked your parents to be more demanding or lax?

      We all have a “trauma” or bad memory from our childhood. We can regret that our parents were not demanding enough when we did not want to play sports and therefore we are not comfortable with our physical capacities.

      Others, on the other hand, may be angry with their parents for being too hard on studying or doing homework, denying us hours of play with our friends in the park. These are things that it would be good to bring to light in the family.

      22. Which do you prefer: € 1,000,000 today or 1 cent doubled every day for 30 days?

      This question is ideal for teaching the teenager the concept of interest. If at first glance, the option of keeping $ 1,000,000 today may seem more profitable, the truth is that 1 cent doubles its value each day makes the end of the month $ 5,368,709.12, worth more. five times higher.

      23. Do you prefer to be the boss or an employee?

      Not everyone feels comfortable being a boss or being an employee. Some prefer to send because they believe they have leadership skills, while others prefer to obey orders, preferring to do before they have to think about what to do. In this world, we cannot all be one or the other, as both roles are necessary. The goal is to find out what works best for you.

      24. If you could have just one superpower, what would it be?

      Mind reading is one of the favorite superpowers of teenagers. Not only to find out what the “scholar” in his class is responding to the math exam, but also to find out what his “crush” thinks of him.

      Other equally interesting powers that can tell us are transparency or the ability to teleport into a dangerous situation. These powers and many others can tell us how the young person feels, especially when it comes to wanting to disappear.

      25. Could you describe yourself in 5 words or less?

      Five words are enough to describe you. But unlike the monosyllabic answers we stated at the beginning, these five words must be more complex. You must select 5 words that contain enough information to describe the immensity of your person. A task that will make your brain wrinkle a lot.

        26. If you could give every person in the world a gift but it could only be the same, what would it be?

        This question is difficult. You need to choose a gift that you find useful for everyone, whether you live in Europe or Africa, whether you are a child or a 90 year old.

        27. Imagine that you are the president and you have to choose three people to help you: what would they be and why?

        Depending on the historical moment in which you have to live, you can choose one or the other professional, both related to the political world and not. Maybe you put more importance on the Minister of Health or a scientific expert living in a pandemic, or maybe you see culture as fundamental and let yourself be advised by philologists and artists.

        28. If you could make one rule for the whole family and you had to follow, what would it be?

        It may not be shouting, listening to everyone equally, not smoking … The question that arises with this question aims to work on emotional intelligence, Both to recognize situations that he does not like that occur in his family and to empathize with his parents and siblings.

        29. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you be?

        Regardless of their satisfaction with living where they had to live, everyone wants to travel to new places, get rid of the monotony of their birthplace. Paris, Tokyo, New York, Patagonia … and many others can be dream places for any teenager.

        30. What do you think makes teenagers grow taller?

        This question can be really revealing. Although the age of majority is set at 18, not everyone is equally an adult at this age. There are people who mentally were already like adults at 14 while others, you could say at 22, behave as if they were still in school. Mental maturity is a psychological phenomenon that depends on many factors, factors that can influence very differently from one person to another.

        31. What have you learned in your life that you think will benefit you the most?

        Whether in high school, at home, or just with friends, there are many things a teenager can find useful in life, whether for work or to form a family if they want to.

        32. How would you describe a perfect day from when you wake up to when you go to bed?

        Each person has an idea of ​​what a perfect day is. To get up and toast, walk the dog, watch your favorite TV show, take a shower before bed …

        33. If you could change anything in the world, what would these three things be and why?

        You might want them to have no borders or to finish high school and teach us what everyone thinks is practical. There are a lot of options.

        34. What do you think is best ?: Being very good at one skill or being poor but having multiple

        The eternal debate between focusing on one thing I have a lot of more or less developed skills. You can tell us that you would like to be very good at mental arithmetic because you want to be an engineer, but what good is being good at math and being a total disaster in personal relationships? Depending on your vital goals, we may need to stress that it is very important to be versatile.

        35. What is the best invention that has been created recently and what do you like about it?

        While it is not necessary that there necessarily be a large generational gap between parents and children, there is always something technological that costs us adults. Today’s teens are experts in new technologies because they are digital natives. They find out everything with just one click.

        If we ask them what they are naturally expert at, they can give us a real master class on the benefits of the latest mobile apps and of course on this topic they will spread. Adults can learn a lot from them.

        36. What do you think makes our family great?

        Each family is special in its own way. Life isn’t always rosy, but surely there is more than one thing that has made this family amazing. It is possible for each member to experience it differently, and the adolescent, of course, will also have his own vision. Of course, this question will make you more aware of your family history.

        37. What are the three things that you are thankful for in your life and why?

        Having a family to support you, not being hungry, not having been through a war … all of these things are reasons you can feel grateful.

        38. What are the 3 small victories that you have won in the last few days that you are proud of?

        This question is great for boosting a teen’s self-esteem, because, however small, the victories he has achieved in recent days are still his own merits. With this you might know that as long as we manage to move forward we will win.

        39. What hobby do you not practice or have you learned that you would like to learn? What is preventing you from getting started?

        We all wanted to learn how to do a lot of things, but given the size of our lives and the fact that resources are what they are, we haven’t always been able to do everything we wanted. But even though it’s never too late, young people can still do whatever they want.

        They may not always have facilities and there may be obstacles along the way, but once identified it is we, the elderly, who can help them achieve their goal.

        40. What do you think are the best things to live for in order to have a good life?

        Having kids, getting married, having a career, traveling to an exotic place … there are endless options that can tell us that.

        41. If we’ve lost everything we’ve accomplished so far, but could keep three things, which three things would you prefer them to be?

        Things are still material goods that can be picked up in the store. However, the emotional value that we attach to it is something irreparable. There are a lot of things a teenager can feel connected to, but getting them to choose between three can be a very interesting exercise in learning priorities. Maybe he decides between things that are of great value to him, or he can be realistic and decide to save food or survival goods.

        42. Imagine that you are the teacher in your high school. What three things would you like to be taught and do you think that would make the institute a much more useful place for your future?

        The curriculum is what it is, and teens often don’t feel very inspired by what they need to learn. For this reason, a very good option is to ask them what they would like to be taught in the classroom. This question is particularly useful for teachers, as they can do didactic planning based on what their students tell them, always being realistic.

        43. When someone feels stressed, what three suggestions would you make to make them feel less stressed?

        A teenager is not a psychologist but, like everyone else, you may have developed strategies to help you deal with stress. These same strategies can be helpful to others and can do your knowledge a great favor by sharing them. Likewise, it should be noted in iron this question that psychologists already play an important role in solving anxiety problems.

        44. What do you think is the most difficult job in the world and why?

        Difficult question for a teenager who has not yet had contact with the world of work, but of course very revealing on his way of seeing the world of work. It’s even possible that we come to know where he would like to lean. He may find the craft very difficult and prefer to pursue something more intellectual, or he may enjoy being an artist and not wanting to study medicine the way we would have liked.

        45. When you get up every morning, if you could think of three things that would make you really happy, what would be three things and why?

        Small daily actions can make us really happy at the end of the day. Many, when we get up, think, for example, that we are going to eat spaghetti at noon and that makes us happy. Others think we’ll see our best friend in class or match who we secretly love in the biology lab split. There are many things that fill our souls no matter how small

        46. ​​How would you explain the word “love” to someone without using the word “love”?

        Love is a magical feeling and whether as a couple or as a parent we have all experienced it at some point in our lives. Trying to define it, in your own words, is a truly exciting exercise in creativity and imagination, both figuratively and literally. What is love? It’s feeling butterflies in your stomach, warmth in your heart, feeling how you are collapsing … there are a lot of things, what is our child going to say that he hears?

        47. Do you think that money helps buy happiness?

        Money doesn’t give happiness, but of course it can help. There are a lot of things that can be bought with money, but what can make us happy? The material itself or the experiences we are going through? This question can give rise to an interesting way of looking at life, of understanding what happiness is for our son or daughter.

        48. Think about the worst thing that has happened to you in your entire life. What did you learn about it?

        Remembering sometimes hurts, but it serves to learn from what we would not like to have happened. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.

        49. Of all the things you learn, both in school and in life, what will be most useful to you as an adult?

        Without questioning the educational program, there are not a few things that are of no real practical use in the lives of most students.

        It is for this reason that there are many teenagers who, when they arrive in class, feel unmotivated. On the other hand, there is a lot of knowledge that they think will perhaps serve them well, especially if it is related to who they would like to become in the future.

        50. If you could travel three years back, what advice would you give yourself?

        We would all like to change a lot of things in our lives, and teens are no exception. He might have regretted choosing the institute where he studies, or he would have preferred not to have told this girl or boy that he loved him and that they would give him pumpkins. It is important not to be too intrusive with this problem, as we may be able to make it close in on itself more.

        51. Which of your friends do you think is the best and the worst of me?

        It is important not to suggest that any of his friends get sick with us, because at these ages they are more likely to side with the friend than ours, and even do so as an act of rebellion.

        52. If you could become famous, what would you like to be made famous?

        Being famous is something that many teens want to be, but being famous for having a great skill as an actor or singer is not the same as being famous for being a creator of content on TV. social networks. There are many ways to become famous and at the same time there are many risks associated with it. Not all fame comes with effort, and neither is it good.

        53. How would you change the world if you could?

        A teenager is much more aware of the cruelty of the world. There are a lot of things you might want to change, like hunger, social injustice, or homophobia. Of course, this question can give rise to much debate, lead father and son to share their opinions, as well as teach how this world works.

        54. How can you help someone today?

        Without the need for education, just having both hands available and the willingness to help, human beings, no matter how young, can work real miracles.

        55. If you could establish one rule that everyone on the planet should obey, what would it be?

        It is possible to say a rule that, although simple and obvious, the truth is that no one in this world seems to respect, such as not to kill, not to make war, not to violate …

        56. If you had enough money to never have to work, what would you do in your spare time?

        Maybe he surprises us and tells us that he wants to work, because rather than doing it to make money, he wants to do it because it’s a job that he really enjoys and that he serves to help others. Or he may even say that he will never want to stop learning, continue his university education, or start taking language courses.

        57. Have you turned down opportunities that you now regret giving up?

        There are trains that only pass once, and although still young, the teenager may have missed more than one. It should be clear that the point of this question should not be to encourage guilt and repenting for missing an opportunity, but looking back on what he learned from missing an opportunity.

        58. If you were told that you were going to live forever, what would you change in your life?

        Humans have an expiration date. We don’t know when we’ll die, but we know we can’t live forever. This is the reason why we always think about future plans we will do before we die and there are not few people who live busy lives making sure that they manage to do what they want before we die. their inevitable end.

        But what if we could live forever? Would we live more peacefully? Do we dare to do things that take a lot longer? This is a very interesting question to ask our teenager.

        59. What are you most afraid of?

        From fear that parents will divorce the rest of the classmates not accepting them, to not getting the grade needed to be accepted into the career they would like to study. A young person can fear many things. As parents, it is important to identify them, to see if they can be put into perspective. For example, the fear that their parents will divorce is based on a simple marital dispute.

        60. What do you think is keeping you from being completely happy?

        Happiness is a state we would all like to be in, but it is neither permanent nor easy to achieve. There are a lot of things that can keep us from being happy, whether it’s our family or our social environment.. It could be that their parents’ discussions are what annoys the teenager and sometimes makes him sad, or also has trouble understanding a topic.

        Knowing what the young person cannot achieve is very important for his parents, especially if there is anything they can do to change this situation.

        61. What is your greatest strength and your greatest weakness?

        People are not perfect. We have strengths and weaknesses and, knowing them, we have a deeper knowledge of ourselves. It is very important that during adolescence the boy or the girl knows what is good for him and what he is having problems with. Knowing what is right for you can help you hone and enjoy it, focusing on your future. A good way to find out is to use a personal DOFA matrix.

        62. What is the greatest achievement that you have had that you are proud of and why?

        You don’t need to have done something truly transformative and transcendent to feel proud. A teenager may be proud of having good grades in high school, but may also be happy to have read all the Harry Potter books, captured the original 151 Pokémon, or passed Cooper’s entire test in gym class. … the adolescent is proud, we must listen to him and value him.

        63. What have you done in the past 24 hours to improve someone else’s life?

        This question is really philosophical. There are many daily actions which, although small, can be something truly transcendent in the lives of others.

        From the reception of the cleaning lady at the school, to the conversation with an elderly woman who is waiting for the bus at the stop. These little acts, which can happen every day, are sometimes small joys for people who really don’t have to influence us.

        64. How do you think you will be in a relationship?

        Although in adolescence it is normal to be too young to have a partner, many young teens have even had sex. Having a partner is not an easy thing to think about, let alone being a young person who has not reached the age of majority. Likewise, getting an idea of ​​what the ideal boyfriend or girlfriend should look like can allow you to work, a priori, on romantic relationships.

        65. What has had the most impact on your life?

        There are many experiences that a person may have had even if they are not yet eighteen years old. There may be many events, at home and at school, that may have marked them, positively or negatively. Talk about it it can be a great outing for the teenager, In addition to letting your parents know more about the history of your child’s life.

        66. What do you do at night when you cannot sleep at night?

        Many teens have trouble falling asleep, especially if they are worried about their studies or how they are treating them in the classroom. This question is ideal for finding out if they have insomnia, camouflaging the interest of knowing what to think when they can’t sleep.

        67. If we humans grow up learning from our mistakes, why are we afraid to fail?

        It’s a great way to deal with fear of failure and turn it into curiosity for success. It is important to emphasize the idea that the one who fails is not the one who tries, but the one who already gives up before at least trying it.

        68. What product would you like to store if you know it will no longer be manufactured or sold?

        Many times companies sell limited edition products. Other times, something that was a part of our childhood stops being made, for some reason we don’t know (eg Jungly Chocolate). It’s a relatively trivial thing, but ceasing to exist can be, to some extent, a psychological shock. Asking the teenager what is part of his current life that he would like to keep in industrial quantities if he found out that he would no longer manufacture is a very good way to get to know him.

        69. Do you have any bad habits that you would like to stop? What are they?

        Smoking, drinking in secret, using marijuana, using a cell phone … these are habits that no parent would want their child to develop, but it’s best to know when there is still time to work on them. It is very important not to approach it with drama, Nor punish for it. The best way to solve these problems is to find out who got involved.

        70. If you had no physical, economic or psychological barriers, what skill would you like to develop?

        Everything can answer us here. Go from driving a Ferrari through Italy to learning to hang gliding or learning all the decimals of the number Pi. This question leaves much to the imagination.

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