Part of the reason why bullying and bullying among minors in general is a social problem is that many parents do not face this kind of situation when it is their children who hit other children. This asymmetry means that the victims receive all the pressure, while in the family sphere of the aggressors, permissiveness reigns.
Fortunately, there are adults who take the first step in resolving such situations, and they wonder. “What if my child hits other kids at school or not?“.
In this article, we will go through various tips and guidelines to follow to stop this behavior from occurring, affecting the education of the little one. Thus, regardless of whether a child engages in a dynamic of bullying or engages his brother or sister, we will avoid further harm.
What to do if a child regularly hits other children
Any change takes time and effort, and that means that while it would be desirable for our son or daughter to stop trying to assault others overnight, it usually doesn’t. Our efforts must be focused on achieving change as quickly as possible and that they cause the least inconvenience to others during this process.
Therefore, educational actions should be varied and should be applied in many areas of the life of the problem child.
1. Take him to the psychologist
The behavioral problems of many children can be solved without the intervention of psychologists, but the fact that we usually hit other children is bad enough to act consistently with our concerns and turn to professionals who offer personalized psychological care.
Therefore, the steps that we will see below should be initiatives that complement the psychological intervention and, when in doubt, it is important to obey the instructions of that person, because their knowledge of the specific case helps to offer solutions that adapt to what is happening. .
2. Make them feel supported in their change process
It is clear that mistreating others is morally wrong, although this does not mean that our behavior towards our son or our daughter should be guided by revenge or for the purpose of causing physical or psychological harm. Everything we do with regard to the child’s aggressiveness must be aimed at preventing him from having these tendencies, nothing more.
Therefore, you should feel support from your parents, notice that you have a way of redeeming yourself by striving to change habits and ways of dealing with your urges. You should feel responsible for the pain you cause others when you strike, but that doesn’t mean that the weight of our intervention in your education should focus on the guilt. You need to focus on the positive, constructive mission to mature as a person, to be better.
3. Show exemplary behavior
Not all children show an aggressive tendency towards their peers because they have followed their parents’ example. But in any case, you should pay special attention to others manage our own frustrations well by assimilating situations that make us angry.
It is better not only not to do it in front of this child who beats other children, but in all our behavior in general, so that it is a more natural and spontaneous tendency.
In addition, we will thus prevent our son or our daughter from justifying his attacks and aggressions by thinking that our anger is a reflection of what they do to others, that in the end everyone is involved in actions that create problems. free and unjustified confrontations. .
4. Pay attention to their feelings
It is important to have regular communication with our children, especially if they have hit others, to give them a chance to express their discomfort. Often this aggression is the product of frustrations that have nothing to do with the victim and even these can be born in the same house. In addition, this habit of wondering how they feel makes them feel supported and perceive aggression and hostility as an anomaly.
5. make sure you meet therapy goals
The work that is done in the consultation of the psychologist must have consequences in the daily life of the child, not only lasts the time during which the session passes. Be aware of the therapeutic goals to be followed and monitors its compliance or non-compliance.
6. Act when aggressive behavior begins
Whenever the signals that are going to be given to attack behaviors, whether physical or verbal, begin to occur, it is necessary to intervene by remembering their commitment to change or by physically avoiding them if they do not. there is no other solution. This “relapse” must have consequences, certainly as we have not seen, not intended for suffering, but for strengthening its attachment to a peaceful and non-violent attitude.