The vast majority of parents want the best for their children and often act in good faith, thinking that they are doing the right thing to educate them. The educational style we use to raise a son or daughter it can have both a positive and a dramatic effect on the development of these young people, and their disciplinary strategies will influence the type of relationship that is established between the two.
At the same time, parenting styles exert a great influence on a child’s mood, behavior and well-being both in the present and in the future.
There are four educational styles. In this article we will deepen their characteristics and explain their differences.
History of educational styles
Educational styles, also called parenting styles, have been extensively studied by developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind. In the early 1960s, Baumrind closely studied more than 100 preschoolers, observing and interviewing their parents. His studies gave birth to what we today call educational or parenting styles.
Baumrind also studied four dimensions that he considered important: heat and nutrition, disciplinary strategies, communication style and expectations of maturity and control. In his turn, in 1966, Baumrind identified three parenting styles: authoritarian, democratic and permissive, And published a text titled: Child Care Practices Anteceding Three Patterns of Preschool Behavior.
According to the author, Distrustful and unhappy children had controlling and unpretentious parentsDependents had caring parents who set no limits, and happy, independent parents had demanding but communicative parents. A few years later, in 1983, Maccoby and Martin extended Baumrind’s work and they developed the fourth parenting style, the indifferent or careless style.
The 4 parenting styles
Each educational style has different characteristics. Below is a list that will help you understand the 4 parenting styles.
1. Authoritarian style
The authoritarian style it is based on severe discipline, Where parents set the rules and expect children to follow them without exception. It is also known as a military parenting style because the father or mother uses very strict rules in the family, encouraging obedience.
Parents with this parenting style they are controllers, give little support to their children and are subject to punishment, Threatens and can even exert violence. If the child breaks family rules, he will be severely punished without hearing his explanation.
Although bossy children follow the rules most of the time, they often develop self-esteem issues because parents never considered their needs or their feelings and emotions. They can also become hostile or aggressive children., Who do not know how to make decisions and solve problems. Several studies suggest that children raised with this style of upbringing perform well in school, but are at risk of developing poor social skills, which is therefore considered a negative parenting style.
2. Permissive style
The permissive style may seem like a good parenting style because many parents use it believing that this way their son or daughter will be happier; but in the long run it can lead to serious emotional consequences. Permissive parents they try to protect their children from harmful incidentsThey do not set any standards for the behavior of their young and are very tolerant.
These parents they are characterized by their instability and their weak control over the situation. Studies show that children who grow up in environments with this parenting style tend to perform poorly at school and may have more behavior problems, as they are likely to ignore authority and rules. They often have low self-esteem and may experience sadness. They tend to be fancy and pampered people.
3. Democratic style
It is without a doubt one of the healthiest educational styles to raise children. Democratic parents tend to be steadfast but also provide support and affection to their little ones. They set limits, but they also take into account the child’s point of view. In other words, they set rules for children to follow; however, they consider that there are exceptions to these rules.
Democratic parents often explain the consequences of their children’s negative behavior instead of applying punishments. Likewise, they use positive reinforcement for the right behaviors and may be more willing than authoritarian parents to use reward and praise systems.
Studies show that children raised in this educational style they tend to be happier and perform better. They are often good at decision-making and enjoy higher self-esteem, and older people are more responsible and feel comfortable voicing their opinions.
4. Careless or indifferent style
this style is characterized by the fact that parents are not involved in the education of their children and therefore do not provide them with the necessary support or guide them. They show no affection or discipline and, counted and debated, pay no attention to their young.
Research shows this is a very harmful style for young people and parenting behavior it has a negative impact globally on the development of their children both in the present and in the future.
Indifferent parents put their children’s emotional health and self-esteem at risk and they cause serious psychological problems in different areas of their future life, For example, interpersonal relationships or work.
How are toxic parents?
The role of parents is fundamental for the development of their children. Although the vast majority of parents want the best for their little one, unfortunately some they make parenting mistakes that can affect growth and emotional health of his descendants.
- If you want to know what toxic parents look like, you can read this article: “Toxic Parents: 15 Characteristics Kids Hate”