When you imagine one nen malcriatYou could imagine a child in a house full of toys. But it’s not over-the-top gifts or toys that make a spoiled child grow up, but it is parenting behavior and how to educate which will really affect your future personality.
To get along with a spoiled child, it may be easier to get carried away by their demands and give in to their manipulation, but the only thing that is achieved with this is to make it clear that you can get what you want in the time you want.
While sometimes giving in to blackmail may seem like the most appropriate thing, in the long run the person who will suffer from the parents’ bad manners is the spoiled child himself.
If you have a child, How can you recognize that you are spoiled? Here are the 8 mistakes you can make if you are a parent.
1. make your child the center of the universe
Of course you want the best for your child, but doing what they want is your priority at all times, teaches him that the world is fair for him. This can have a negative effect on your child’s development as he or she may ignore the needs of others in the future. Children must learn to give and receive, not just to receive. In addition, they must learn to understand that not everything in life can be achieved without effort. Gradually, the child must be freed from the egocentric attitude.
2. Don’t reinforce your positive behavior
Busy parents may not notice that their child is silent without doing anything wrong. If you don’t reinforce your child’s positive behaviors, you may not understand that they are doing well..
3. Reinforce negative behaviors
On many occasions, parents not only ignore positive behaviors, but reinforce negative behavior. If you only recognize your child when they cry, you are sending them the wrong message because they may associate that just by crying they are getting your full attention.
4. Don’t put limits on your child
If you don’t set rules and apply them to your child, he or she may become rude, uncooperative and disrespectful. Young children need to know where the line is so they don’t become uncivilized individuals. Part of the job of parents is to teach social values, such as the respect where the patience.
5. Consistent non-application of the rules
While some parents place no limits on their child’s behavior, others set ambiguous or inconsistent limits. For example, a father who does not let his son play with food for a few days but his older brother does. If the rules you set for your child are inconsistent or ambiguous, it will interfere with their learning of the rules.
6. Give gifts to your child when he is not playing
What you give to your child is not as important as when give it away. For example, buying a bike for your child just because you’re bored with the one you gave them two months ago can teach them not to value the things they own.
7. Give in to those who are angry
Giving in to your child’s rages is one way to reinforce negative behavior, And teach your child that he can get anything he wants by crying, kicking and with constant rages and outbursts of tone, and not speaking or fulfilling his obligations.
8. Act like a spoiled child
You are a role model for your child, and the way you interact with family members is something you can learn. If you behave childishly in front of your child, you might think this is the way to act..
One more strategy: learn the importance of children’s self-esteem
Children’s self-esteem should not be based on excessive and artificial praise of their merits. When we can get the child to have a positive but realistic self-image of himself, it is very likely that he will relate to his environment in a healthy way.
Here is an article by educational psychologist Bertrand Regader that can help you: “10 strategies to improve your child’s self-esteem”