25 questions about gender-based violence to spot abuse

Gender-based violence and domestic violence they remain to this day a social problem to be taken into account. Several people are attacked in different ways or even murdered for reasons such as gender stereotypes or belonging to a particular sex.

But in many cases, people who experience this type of abuse do not dare to report for fear of reprisal, believing it to be normal behavior or even facing the possible difficulty of setting limits. gender-based violence.

Being able to detect gender-based violence is a prerequisite for dealing with it. This is why there are several protocols and procedures dedicated to this. In this article we intend to indicate a series of questions that can be used to help detect cases of gender-based violence.

    Table of Contents

    Gender-based violence

    Gender-based violence is any act in which a person is seen, assaulted, coerced or generally injured by violence. due to belonging to a specific sex or gender.

    More precisely, this type of violence is defined as specifically directed from man to woman because acts of aggression are committed on the basis of gender stereotypes which they place the female as the weak and inferior sex and submissive to the male. It aims to maintain a relationship of domination, superiority and power with the victim, based on these stereotypes. It usually occurs in the couple realm, although it is not the only one in which it can be observed.

    even if there are also men who are abused by women and in their concept this would be included as gender violence, they are generally not considered as such due to their lower frequency and the fact that the reason does not usually belong to the male sex (although this is possible and this happens in some cases, which is why the consideration and specificity of the term gender violence in general is currently being criticized).

    Homosexual violence is not seen as such either (although gender roles can also be the ones that generate aggression).

      The different types of abuse

      Gender-based violence can be very diverse types of violence, such as psychological, physical, sexual or heritage. It is common to try to isolate the victim and make them dependent on the abuser. Violence is generally exercised in three moments or phases: a first escalation of tension, the same aggression and finally a possible phase of repentance or “honeymoon”.

      Due to the different forms of assault that can exist and the different beliefs that some people have about it (for example, some victims think they deserve this treatment), it is sometimes difficult to identify which situations are or are not being abused even for the person attacked. This is why it is necessary to carry out protocols to identify these situations.

      Questions to detect gender violence

      Here are some questions that can be asked or that we are asking ourselves in order to detect if there is any form of gender-based violence.

      As with other types of violence, if these questions are asked in an interview, it is possible to observe signs of abuse or inconsistencies between the verbal or written response and the non-verbal behavior.

      1. What role does a woman play in a relationship? And a man?

      This question may seem innocent, but it allows to know the opinion of the person being questioned (either the attacked or the aggressor) with regard to the role of each of the sexes.

      2. Have you ever humbled or criticized yourself in public or in private?

      While abusers generally tend not to display any form of aggression in public and limit aggression to the private sphere, it is sometimes possible to detect an underestimation of the woman’s opinion or action by question when she is in the company.

      3. Have you ever been pressured to have sex or had sex out of fear of your partner?

      Sexual violence, in the form of rape or coercion, Is also common.

      4. Have you ever been pushed or hooked?

      Physical violence is often the easiest to observe both from the outside and by the victim, although it can sometimes be difficult for the victim to specify where an assault begins (for example, she may not consider a relapse. Such as).

      5. Do you feel like you are trying to get away from your surroundings?

      It is common for the abuser to try to remove the abused person from their surroundings, making them as dependent as possible.

      6. Do you mind having male friends or having contact with family and friends?

      For the same reason as above, the existence of contact with other men or close relationships can be seen as a threat to their relationship.

      7. Have you ever grabbed your cell phone and looked at your messages without permission?

      Jealousy and the possibility of being abandoned it often prompts the abuser to try to control interactions with other people.

        8. Does he continually send you messages about where and with whom you are?

        Another very common element observed in abuse is exhaustive control over what the victim does, and especially with whom. Sometimes they even ask for photos and evidence.

        9. Does he insult you or give you derogatory nicknames?

        Making the victim feel inferior is a common mechanism in gender-based violence, which can be used to keep them in check and in control.

        10. Has your partner ever threatened or threatened someone close to you or made you feel like they were in danger if you hadn’t done or stopped doing something?

        Vicarious violence, especially with children, is used to coerce and sometimes it prevents the victim from making decisions such as reporting or leaving their partner.

        11. Do you feel safe at home?

        People who are victims of gender-based violence often feel uncomfortable at home, fear of doing something that triggers an assault.

        12. Does he frequently compare you to other people and put you below them?

        Again, a common method of weakening the victim’s self-esteem is to highlight aspects that the victim is inferior to the abuser compared to other people.

        13. Have you ever tried to report or withdraw a complaint to your partner?

        Today, many allegations of gender-based violence are withdrawn in the face of the perpetrator’s promise to change or in the face of fear of possible repercussions on the victim or his environment.

        14. Does this stop you or try to convince you not to work?

        The need to have power over women this often leads to not working, being economically dependent on the subject.

        15. Do you decide for yourself?

        Again, this question tries to get you thinking about whether there is a restriction on freedom and whether there is independence from the other member of the couple.

        16. Have you ever had to hide the blues?

        It is common for people who suffer from gender-based violence to try to hide the marks that physical assault causes them, with frequent fingerprints, bites and punches on the face and other areas of the body.

        17. Has he ever told you that you are worthless, that you deserve to be dead, or that he is the only one who can love you and that you should be grateful to him?

        Such statements can become relatively common and victims can believe them. causing low self-esteem and a feeling that the abuser is superior.

          18. When you go out, does it force you to fix it or not?

          Some abusers use their partners as a trophy to show off in public, forcing them to get back in order and be spectacular. In other cases, they force them to be low-key and appear as unattractive as possible because they cannot attract other people.

          19. Does this prevent or prohibit you from doing whatever you want?

          The restriction of freedoms is done either directly by force, or by prohibition, or by the use of devaluations of certain actions are very common in situations of gender-based violence.

          20. Do you think you can deserve a slap from your partner?

          While most people would answer no, the manipulation to which they are subjected makes some victims see themselves as deserving of abuse.

          21. What do you think would happen to your children if you left your husband?

          sometimes it is the presence of children and the possible repercussions for them that slow down the victims gender-based violence to report and / or end the relationship with the abuser.

          22. Have you ever threatened or hooked your children to force you to do something, or blamed them for having to hit them?

          Vicarious violence is used as a mechanism to coerce the victim and force her to remain submissive.

          23. Do you think that violence only occurs in unstructured families?

          There is the myth that violence only occurs in unstructured families, In which there is drug use or in families with few resources and with a low level of education. It is indeed possible to observe gender-based violence in very different situations whatever the socio-economic level or the type of family.

          24. Do you consider that violence and abuse only happen when there are beatings?

          Lots of women and lots of men they believe that using slurs or underestimating cannot be considered gender-based violence, While only physical assault is abuse.

          25. Are you afraid or have you ever been afraid of him?

          A direct question, but which allows a simple answer and allows the victim to think about how she feels for her partner. However, it should be remembered that in some cases, they may feel that the abuser needs it or even express their gratitude for the abuse.

          Bibliographical references:

          • Jara, P. and Romero, A. (2009). Gender-based violence type and phase rating scale. Research promotion conference. Jaume I University

          • Pérez, JM and Montalvo, A. (2010). Gender-based violence: analysis and approach to its causes and consequences. Gender-based violence: prevention, detection and treatment. Editorial group. p. 322.

          • Turned, M .; Ruiz, M .; Clerk, MC; Gea, A. and Salmerón, I. (2007). Protocol for the detection and management of gender-based violence in primary care. Murcia Health Service.

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