Having a full sex life is crucial for our level of psychological and emotional well-being., because although we generally associate sex with physical pleasure, this facet of life also includes emotional, cultural and personal factors, important in the development of our identity and our self-esteem.
This is why sexologists, in clinical practice, see on a daily basis how sexuality can be a source of health and well-being, but also of suffering for some people who experience negative or painful situations. In a society like ours, unrealistic expectations, often fueled by misinformation or porn idealization, can cause problems such as anxiety and depression, as various scientific studies confirm.
To counter this, a tool has now emerged that allows one to experience sex from here and now, without judgment and with a compassionate attitude towards oneself and others: it’s sex in full consciousness. In this article, I will explain what it is.
- Related article: “The 13 Benefits of Having Sex, According to Science”
Sex is the greatest expression of mindfulness
Sex can be a very fulfilling and memorable experience, with which you can connect with a person so that time does not seem to pass through this fusion between the bodies of the two loved ones. That moment when the breath of the two unites, where a “state of flow” passes, time flies and you enjoy each sensation without even thinking about it.
This state of good sex is the ultimate expression of Mindfulness, a very popular concept in Psychology that refers to be in the present moment, with full attention and with such a high level of concentration that sensations are experienced as they are, without thinking about it and without judging them.
This relationship between mindfulness and sex is natural, but when someone loses that naturalness and lets worries, anxiety, irrational beliefs, or distorted thoughts enter the bedroom, that’s when. that many problems arise in her sex life. The solution to prevent this from happening… This is called Mindful Sex.
What is conscious sex?
Mindful Sex is a philosophy similar to Tantra, which in many ways draws on this ancient practice and is perhaps the most modern version of it. In addition, it has the scientific approval of Mindfulness. It can be used both therapeutically to correct problems such as erectile dysfunction or vaginismus, or as a sex education tool to help you better understand sexuality. of oneself and with the partner. It is also used to help improve sexual experiences, which have a positive impact on well-being and romantic relationships. Many workshops are offered today where theory is learned and mindfulness exercises are done to put them into practice in the sexual realm.
To understand what Mindful Sex is, you need to know what Mindfulness is and what are its benefits, since it is a millennial practice used in the West thanks to the fact that Jon Kabat-Zin, professor of medicine at the University of Massachusetts popularized this philosophy. with its Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Program (MBSR), which is now used by many psychologists in its therapeutic practice, as well as mindfulness-based cognitive therapy.
Mindfulness can also be learned by any individual as a philosophy of life, based on healthy mental habits, and as a way to live better in today’s society, where people find it increasingly difficult to relate to their emotions and to live in a context of immediacy, because we are constantly connected to new technologies in a globalized world. This practice is a good way to stop and enjoy the present instead of living on autopilot trapped by the madness of modern societies.
The implications of mindfulness for well-being and emotional balance
Mindfulness allows you to develop a full awareness of the here and now without judging experience, emotions or thoughts, just see them from a more objective point of view and accept them as they are. Its implications for well-being are numerous: it reduces stress and anxiety, allows you to be more realistic, more enjoyable experiences, improves concentration and memory, and improves productivity at work or in sport, you allows for healthier relationships, helps to overcome insomnia, etc.
The good thing is that mindfulness can be learned through training over several weeks, just like mindful sex, which ultimately involves applying mindfulness to the realm of sexuality and sexual practice.
Although mindfulness is often confused with meditation, they are not the same. Meditation, especially Vipassana, is a useful resource for developing mindfulness, but there are other non-meditative exercises that are also useful for this purpose.
Benefits of conscious sex
Mindful Sex also has a positive effect on people’s lives for a variety of reasons.
1. Generates spaces of intimacy for the couple
From sexual mindfulness it is based on principles such as non-judgment and compassion for oneself and for others, allows you to have healthier relationships and to see sex without taboos. This is essential because it improves communication and each member of the couple can fully enjoy their sexuality, thus creating a greater connection between the two actors in a love affair.
2. Reduces stress, anxiety and helps overcome sexual problems
The non-judgmental mindset focused on the current trait of sexual mindfulness has a big effect on people’s mental health. Many sexual problems are caused by anxiety and irrational expectations about sex and sexuality., and with Mindful Sex, there is no room to think more about the count, just to feel and experience the here and now.
3. It allows you to explore more pleasurable sexual situations
Mindful Sex, as I mentioned, is based on the principle of non-judgment, which equates to open-mindedness. This means that there are no limits to intercourse and that the sexual moments are more pleasant.
4. Improve the sexual experience and orgasm
As with Tantra, Mindful Sex enhances the sexual experience because it does not focus on achieving orgasm, but on greater concentration to live the experience to the fullest, by using all the senses to perceive more intensely the caresses, the kisses, the rubbing of the fingers… Paradoxically, concentrating on the senses makes it possible to think of nothing else (reduce anxiety or eliminate expectations) and to have more pleasurable sexual experiences and greater orgasms.
5. This is the key to living a fuller life.
Having a more fulfilling sex life is essential to enjoy greater well-being and better self-esteem. Part of the reason is that couples with active sex lives enjoy greater satisfaction in a love affair, which has an impact on life in general.