In a way, our lives are made up of habits and routines.
What we do defines who we are and to some extent if we change our way of life day by day, we also change ourselves. Our habits have transformative power, and this can also be applied to emotional intelligence.
In fact, the very idea of what emotional intelligence is suggests that it can be trained by routines. If emotional intelligence is ultimately our ability to manage emotions successfully, And we vary the way these emotions appear, we will also turn the challenge of facing them into something else.
11 habits of people with good emotional intelligence
Below I present 11 habits that characterize very intelligent people. Taking this list of characteristics into account can be useful in knowing how close or far we are from this “ideal” of an emotionally intelligent person and also in experimenting with new strategies to develop this type of intelligence.
Of course, this is a set of characteristics that serve as a guide, not an absolute yardstick, to differentiate people with high emotional intelligence and clearly distinguish them from those who are not. Intelligence is a gray scale, not two clearly separated categories.
1. They learn to clearly express their feelings
People with high emotional intelligence knowing how to manage your own emotions does not mean repressing. However, they also know that when you are in the company of other people you have to consider how they interpret what we are expressing. Balance is the key to interactions.
For that, they are trying to find ways to honestly reveal their emotional state, Without generating conflicting messages. This requires training in how they themselves examine their emotions, which brings us to the next point. We are talking about sincere and genuine people.
2. They are always attentive to their own needs
Having good emotional intelligence means, among other things, be clear at all times that human needs go far beyond physiological needs, Like food or drink, and include other people of an emotional nature. This is why people with high emotional intelligence get used to thinking about how they feel and have the same number of such needs as others.
Monitoring this dimension of one’s own psychology gives the possibility of improving oneself when diagnosing any emotional conflicts that may arise in oneself.
3. They are trained to properly identify feelings
It is of little use to monitor emotional state if you cannot distinguish one type of emotion from another. This is why these people who are distinguished by good emotional intelligence they strive to find the differences and similarities between the emotional nuances they feel.
They can do this by focusing on their own emotions as well as those of others, or even soaking up works of fiction in which the characters have complex personalities and a well-developed psychological dimension. In addition, they must generate their own way of referring to these emotions, using words that they know well.
4. They find it difficult to manage their care well
People with high emotional intelligence keep in mind that there are so many painful experiences in the world that, if we focused only on them, we would not bring up any. However, they also know that something similar happens with happy experiences, so if we had only the latter in mind, we would be living in a very stimulating reality, albeit very separate from reality.
That is why they try to direct attention according to criteria of utility for themselvesAnd don’t fall into the trap of optimism or pessimism that catches your way of seeing things. In other words, they rule their goal in a way that they don’t rule them.
5. Analyze the viability of your aspirations
If in capitalist society taking risks without practically thinking about the consequences of failure is rewarded, emotionally intelligent people tend to decide which projects to spend their time on and their efforts according to the expected chances of success, so as not to work on an unrealistic framework of expectations.
In this way, success or failure does not come to them so suddenly that they cannot assimilate its impact.
6. They tend to avoid believing that other people want to hurt them
Emotionally intelligent people you don’t have to trust themBut at the same time, they don’t believe that the plans or motives of others go beyond harming them, as if this in and of itself was a pursued goal. This is why incidents are rarely seen as a personal matter.
7. They are self-critical
Looking back and recognizing mistakes can be as helpful as it is therapeutic, and this is why self-criticism is a resource highly valued by people with high emotional intelligence.
This will not only make it difficult to root certain conflicts with other people, but also allow them to have a more realistic and detailed view of both their own abilities and the aspirations and motivations that drive them. This gives them better resources to overcome their fears and progress day by day.
8. They spend time learning how others are
Emotional intelligence it’s also about not going with pre-made speeches about how different types of emotions are.
Therefore, to use this ability, you must first learn on the field how these emotions are and how they express themselves in each of the people who matter, to know what is the best way to relate to them.
9. They learn to motivate themselves
One of the best ways to learn to recognize your own style of expressing emotions is experience what is motivating and what is not. In addition, the results of this learning process can be applied instantly.
Recommended article: “60 motivational phrases to focus on success”
10. Spend time with the people you connect with best
People with high emotional intelligence they don’t have to seek the company of like-minded people, But yes with those with which they integrate better. However, they sometimes step out of their comfort zone to open up to new friendships, which allows them to learn more about themselves.
11. They are not afraid to meet new people.
People with strong emotional intelligence, although they are more or less extroverted, they are able to open up to new experiences.
It also positively influences its social facet. They are people who are not afraid to meet other people, even though they may come from worlds other than their own.
Related article: “Guide to meeting new people”