Of all the personality traits, arrogance is among the least easy to endure. Some arrogant, proud and haughty person can mess with our perfect day.
The arrogant personality is one of the most difficult to bear, with traits so negative and destructive that even the most empathetic, cordial, and peaceful person can end up having to laugh thanks to a truly mean individual.
Unfortunately, in our life we will have to interact more than once with this type of individuals and therefore it is essential to learn how to identify them, understand their particular personality type and know how to deal with people. also arrogant. , which we will see below.
The arrogant personality and its characteristics
There are all kinds of people in life. Some are what we call “beings of light,” very good, pleasant, positive, well-meaning people. We would like to relate only to these types of people, but as in life there are always lights and shadows, it is inevitable that you have to face the other end on more than one occasion, with people who meet characteristics. opposites.
Throughout our life it is inevitable to meet terribly arrogant people. You surely know some. These are the people who seem to be playing roles, as if they are in some evil movie with dictatorial, haughty and arrogant traits.
TO they look over their shoulder and they behave as if they are the best in the world, but weighing them, they have nothing to justify their air of greatness and superiority. These are people who believe in themselves more than they really are.
These are not people who precisely deserve our sympathies. Even though we are very tolerant, understanding people, who always try to see the best in others, arrogant people can infuriate us, make us lose our way.
They arouse a lot of emotions considered “negative”: frustration, discomfort, fear, anger, psychological suffering… they can even deteriorate our self-esteem because of their toxic comments.
While the ideal would be to be able to change their way of being, this is rarely achieved and what they have to do is run away from arrogant people. However, it is not always easy to detect such a person with the naked eye, but luckily it is possible to learn how to do this, by understanding the causes that might be behind your particular personality and being aware of your main characteristics.
Causes of arrogant personality
Without wanting to justify the harmful, toxic and contemptuous behavior of arrogant people, it is necessary to point out that everything has an origin, a cause behind which made a person behave in a proud manner. There are certain psychological reasons that have motivated a person to act the way they do and they are mainly the following:
1. Too much self-esteem
Having too much self-esteem is linked to arrogance especially when the person in question does something that they see that others have not realized, allowing him to come to the conclusion that he is above others because he has already accomplished more than them.
The person uses pride to let others know about all their successes, taking advantage of the envy they have sown in others.
2. Low self-esteem
Low self-esteem is often a source of psychological distress and dysfunctional behavior, with arrogance being one. Many people with arrogant attitudes feel deep frustration and dissatisfaction with life.
To protect himself from the harm that others can do to him, the arrogant is shown with a haughty attitude to feel better about himself and hide his deep insecurity behind a mask which he believes makes others understand that he is much better than them. Arrogance is its defense mechanism.
3. Need to attract attention
Although the behaviors of arrogant people often have a very negative impact on others, it often happens that what they really want is to get their attention and get the approval of others.
Characteristics of arrogant people
We can highlight a number of characteristics that can serve as signals to detect an arrogant person. The main characteristics of the arrogant personality are:
1. Hypocritical attitude
Arrogant people tend to have a very hypocritical attitude towards others, but always behave to achieve their goals.
This is demonstrated by the fact that they can behave in very different ways depending on who they are talking to, praising those who think it might give them some sort of advantage, and treating those who feel below them very badly.
2. Constant competitiveness
Proud people are very competitive. They try to increase their self-esteem by being or showing themselves better than others in any way possible. In these cases, proud people care more about achieving this goal than the well-being of their friends, colleagues and family.
They are very hedonistic individuals, focused on their own desire, satisfaction, and benefit, even if it means hurting others. They are so competitive that they can hurt other people, both physically and verbally, to achieve their goals. They have no qualms.
3. Contempt for others
Usually, because of their insecurity, when they see that people around them are excellent at certain skills, arrogant people they often try to despise these virtues and exalt their own, especially if they consider the people who make up their social environment as competitors.
4. They act with superiority
Arrogant people believe that they are always right, even if they don’t have the slightest idea of the subject they are talking about, and it is even embarrassing to see them talk about the subject in question.
They also believe in bringing reason to any situation, giving them away as the very victims.o. These people will always see their attitude justified by the fact that they feel better than others and act with superiority.
They consider that they have the right to mistreat others, placing them in an inferior position. They lack self-criticism and humility shines through in their absence.
5. Little self-knowledge
Although they think they are better than others, it seems ironic to say that an arrogant person barely knows himself. They have very little knowledge of themselves, especially when it comes to faults. The image of themselves is distorted, which makes them tend towards grandiloquence, believing themselves to be better than they really are.
Because they are not quite sure what they are failing or are humble about in this regard, they will not feel identified in certain faults that they usually have such as, for example, not being kind to others or not being kind to others. be kind.
6. Absolute egocentrism
They like to talk about themselves, a trait inherent in arrogance. Self-centeredness is the most striking characteristic of arrogant, arrogant and arrogant people, who they tend to talk a lot about themselves even if the original topic of conversation did not give rise to it.
7. Zero tolerance for criticism
Everyone is affected by criticism, even those that are well-meaning and constructive. However, in the case of arrogant people, this is excessive, in no case can you tolerate them.
In reality, their inability to resist criticism is so severe that they are able to break friendships for it, and even turn someone into their own worst enemy just by telling them their opinion and not taking it very well.
How to deal with an arrogant person?
Arrogant people can bring us a lot of psychological distress, which is why it is highly recommended to stay away from these people. This is not always possible, especially if the arrogant person in question is a mean parent or a despotic boss. For this reason, we will discover ways to deal with such people.
1. Assume that the other feels superior
No matter what you do, no matter how many merits you have achieved, the arrogant person will always think you are superior to you. Accept it. We don’t mean by that that you accept his superiority, because he doesn’t have any, but understand that their way of thinking about the world is to believe themselves better than others.
We can only accept his attitude, but without believing in his position. If he underestimates us, we need to know that it is not because we are worse off, but because his mind is so distorted about others and himself that he is not acting objectively. . Little importance should be given to his pride.
2. Don’t try to improve it
Arrogant people are difficult to rehabilitate socially, even through the action of psychological therapy. If you do not have the necessary knowledge or experience as to being able to change their harmful and toxic attitude, trying to improve arrogant people is just a waste of time, energy and patience.
As we mentioned, it often happens that arrogant people have low self-esteem and have no empathy for others. Trying to change them is useless if he is unable to detect his problem himself.
3. Communicate your feelings to mentally healthy people
A good way to avoid losing your mind is to communicate our feelings to others, to say how the arrogant person treats us. It won’t change the bully in question, but at least it will keep us in good mental health..
Telling others how we feel whenever our arrogant acquaintance gives us vexatious and derogatory comments can help us see that he is wrong, that what he is telling us is simply the product of his distorted picture of the world and of his feelings. himself. Hopefully we will find enough social support for the arrogant person to isolate himself more and more.
4. Set limits
As far as possible, it’s a great idea to set limits with the person who constantly shows their arrogance. Try to interact with her as little as possible and if you can distance yourself. We can hardly change him, but we can put some ground in the middle to prevent his harmful comments from having an effect on us.
5. Be empathetic
Although the way arrogant people act invites us to behave in every way possible and to no good, we must try to be empathetic, show that virtue that arrogant individuals do not have.
People don’t behave in a toxic way with others because yes there must be some explanation behind it, some psychological disorder or some serious self esteem issue, some psychological issues that the person couldn’t handle.
It does not justify their behavior, but it determines their way of being and taking this into account will help us understand that it is really individuals who have the problem, not us, and that all the bad things they say and do to us. . are the result of being broken inside.
- Parvez, H (2019). Psychology of an arrogant person. Psychological mechanics.
- Sterber, C (2018). 11 habits that distinguish an arrogant person from a narcissist. Xivarri.
- Tanesini, Alessandra. (2020). Ignorance, arrogance and privilege. 10.4324 / 9781315146058-5.
- Von Hayek, F. (2013). Fatal arrogance. Market process: European Journal of Political Economy, 10 (2).