Every human being, for the simple fact of being one, must experience a vital drama: his own interests and the interests of others, which are expressed through social norms, do not coincide. However, to survive you have to exist in a certain social fabric, be it a family, a village, a village or a large city. This is where the strategies created to deal with this tension come in: we have to be ourselves, but trying to avoid that it is worth the contempt or rejection of others.
Fortunately, most people are able to combine these two realities (that of public interests and private interests) well. However, at other times there are those who opt for attitudes that are clearly too cynical or opportunistic to be truly prosocial. normally we know these individuals as hypocrites.
But … what is it that really characterizes hypocrites? Let’s see, from a proposal of 6 characteristics typical of those who adopt this strategy to socialize.
6 characteristics of hypocritical people
Although there are many ways to identify hypocrites, we will generally be able to recognize the following characteristics.
1. Explicit but inconsistent moralism
One of the ways that it is easier to tell the difference between hypocrites is to pay attention to their use of morality.
From an individualistic point of view, moral standards can have an unpleasant side, especially when we feel like we have to do something that we don’t like, but they also have a positive side, because we can appeal to them when we are. want it. people behave in a way that benefits us. The hypocrites know it, and that’s why they use morality to try to get others to be ruled by these values.
Of course, this contrasts with their own respect for the rules. Anyone who lives in an environment where others live under moral constraints that one does not follow has a certain competitive advantage and hypocrites abuse it with little or no remorse.
2. False kindness
Hypocrites tend to seek out quick and dishonest ways to obtain social capital (i.e. the sympathies of many people, or at least the opportunity to turn to them). It is common to do this by feigning a false interest in each other’s lives at key times, such as greetings or farewells. Please note that this is not an honest and spontaneous initiative because, beyond these key moments, sympathy turns into difference.
3. Minimum social contact until the favor arrives
Another of the habitual attitudes of hypocrites is to have “friends” or acquaintances on their agenda, unrelated to them, and to take advantage of them only to ask for specific favors.
Unlike others, who in the age of social media can have many contacts passively stored in the phone book or in the friends section of some of their social media profiles, those with this opportunistic mind are not consistent. with the fact that they barely deal. with these people, and if they can, they actually profit from their knowledge without bringing anything in return.
This is important, because what we appeal to when asking for a favor, friendship, has not existed or no longer exists in practice, only in theory. It does seem, however, that it starts to be a real emotional connection seconds before you make a request. Shortly after, this supposed friendship will fade into oblivion.
4. They make unnecessary gestures of kindness
Trying to invite tapas when someone else has already paid, to warn of an event which is clear that you cannot attend … These gestures are a way of try to seduce people without exposing yourself to little inconvenience or the inconvenience it can generate.
5. Praise on the one hand, complicity in teasing on the other
Another typical attitude of hypocrites is to show themselves as friends when, when the other person is not present and is being criticized, complicity is manifested with these criticisms, whether they are fair or not. It is also common for the hypocritical person to bring out these criticisms, sometimes in an attempt to gain social acceptance by spotting imperfections in others.
6. Disappearances when it hits rock bottom
When a person is going through difficult times, it is relatively common for the hypocritical people around them who have shown a close relationship with the first to disappear anticipating that they will be asked for help, even if it is minimal.