Are you a perfectionist? Be careful not to slip!
Of course, we all have some interest in learning and improving in different areas or aspects of our lives. For people with a marked trait of perfectionism, it is the pursuit of excellence that motivates them to improve. Being meticulous, measured, persevering, responsible … are characteristics that can accompany human perfectionist tendencies, and can bring out the best in oneself. However, frustration, anxiety, stubbornness and ineffectiveness can be the worst enemies of this same behavioral profile.
How do you differentiate a “good” perfectionism from one that is not?How counterproductive can being too much of a perfectionist for yourself? Below we analyze the details that help us get the most out of this personality trait.
People with adaptive perfectionism
People who work with adaptive perfectionism or who exhibit the following characteristics:
- They set high and motivating goals, Assuming challenges, but these goals are realistic and achievable on their terms and achievable.
- The person has good expectations self-efficacy, that is, he knows he can and will achieve these goals, but by accepting what is not fully achieved or the way he has planned it .
- In general, they require people with themselvesBut they are not afraid of mistakes or mistakes, but accept them as a part of life so that they do not easily give up in the face of frustration.
- They are people with extraordinary planning and organization, But with the ability to be flexible enough to deal with setbacks or unpredictable problems.
- Perfectionists can enjoy and focus on their workThey do not focus exclusively on the end result, but are able to learn and take the steps required by the process.
- Another benefit of adaptive perfectionism is that it allows us to understand and endure that there is a certain degree of uncontrollability in what goes on on a daily basis, so that we become more tolerant of uncertainty.
- Adaptive perfectionism comes with significant self-reinforcement and good self-esteem. Thus, the person is able to value their strengths, reward them for their achievements and take care of themselves.
- The person with adaptive perfectionism capable of enjoying a wide variety of activities and disconnecting themselves despite the inconveniences or small imperfections to which they are daily exposed at work, in personal relationships …
People with inadequate perfectionism
Ultimately, adaptive perfectionism is all about allowing the freedom not to be perfect, and ultimately to be human. It is clear that the profile we have described is highly sought after and much appreciated socially, personally and professionally.
But … What happens when we go beyond the limits within which the person begins to experience pain? In this case, we would speak of an inadequate perfectionism, with the following characteristics:
- These people set too many goals which are unrealistic when it comes to self-realization.
- They put a lot of emphasis on being too orderly and controlling and he usually wastes a lot of time in these irrelevant aspects and details, being distracted only what is really important.
- A person with inadequate perfectionism cares a lot about mistakes, Who does not support commitment and excessively fears criticism from others.
- He doesn’t like his job, Focus only on the result and the reinforcement you will get from others. When this is not done, he suffers a lot.
- He thinks his job is never good enough and that you can always do better, so that you have the feeling that you never complete tasks or leave them incomplete.
- Point out everything that is wrong, Instead of recognizing what is done well. It leads to weakened self-esteem by underestimating your strengths and focusing on your weaknesses.
- The disproportionate self-demand for perfectionism leads him to develop high levels of anxiety and suffering. He does not tolerate his own mistake and sometimes that of others as well.
- He struggles to disconnect from the goals of perfectionSometimes you can get into a loop where you can’t stop thinking about how to keep improving, fixing mistakes, or what needs to be done.
- He does not tolerate the frustration of not being perfect, not doing everything right, or not having 100% control.
Inadaptive perfectionism is a way to achieve vital goals that has major drawbacks. Despite the great efforts of those who embrace this style of perfectionism, these people are still frustrated, tired or anxious and will not always do as well as they could if they adopted a slightly more flexible attitude.
We’re all happy to do things great, even perfect sometimes, but that doesn’t mean we can’t come to terms with our imperfections on our own.