The love of a couple, this space of our life that we have decided to share with another person by creating emotional ties, is something that can take many forms and which varies enormously depending on the time and place.
However, in our love life there is something constant and always there that affects the way we perceive our relationship with the other person and the way we interact with them.. It is about our personality or, more precisely, these personality traits that define us.
Our personality applied to love
And while it is true that our personality affects us in all areas of our life, it is nonetheless true that our romantic relationships are one of the most important aspects of our existence. Therefore, everything we know about personality traits, uncovered from decades of scientific research, can be used to find out, roughly, the characteristics of how we tend to experience love.
Therefore, if we want to try to make rough predictions about what our love life will be like, it is much more advisable to base it on what we know about personality traits than to do it on the basis of. pseudosciences such as astrology.
Personality traits and romantic relationships
Below you can read what are aspects of personality traits that help us understand the way we experience romantic relationships.
To do this, we will take as a reference the Model of the 5 great personality traits, also known as the Big Five, in which these personality dimensions are established: extraversion, neuroticism, openness to experience, responsibility and kindness.
This dimension of personality serves to establish the extent to which we tend to be assertive people and seek social interaction in the present. So, is used to measure whether we are more or less socially active or, on the contrary, introverts and difficult to access.
Extroverted people are more exposed to interaction and dialogue with other people, as they come across such situations. That is why they can more easily hone their social skills and become charismatic people, With relative ease in finding a partner and managing the relationship with the person who has a romantic interest.
However, this personality trait is also linked to the tendency to seek short-term relationships and seek novelty in love life, to find new partners, and not to value monogamous life as much as others (something reminiscent of the Coolidge effects).
like that, introverted people may have more difficulty finding a partnerBut if they learn to communicate well with their partner, they are more likely to put effort into making the relationship stable and lasting.
Neuroticism is the dimension that measures the degree of emotional stability or on the contrary, we are very sensitive to mood swings and anxiety levels. Thus, people with a high level of neuroticism are volatile and have more difficulty in self-monitoring their emotional states.
When it comes to love life, a high score on the neurotic trait means a higher likelihood of developing dissatisfaction in the relationship or marriage and divorce.
This may be due to the fact that people with a high degree of neuroticism are particularly susceptible to stress and, moreover, they find it difficult to manage their actions in such a way that it is not a problem in their relationships with others. Therefore, they will be more likely to generate conflicts with some frequency and it will be difficult for them to resolve them by establishing effective communication channels with their partner, because for this they should adopt a calm attitude and see the problem in a colder perspective.
People who, on the other hand, are characterized by their emotional stability, will find it easier to bring up these problems and to recur over time.
3. Openness to experience
This personality trait indicates our propensity for curiosity and how we value having new experiences. or, conversely, the extent to which we like to base our lives on rigid and stable standards. In addition, it is the peculiarity of the Big Five model that has the least impact on our love life. unlike what happens with neuroticism, which allows us to better predict what our relationships will look like.
If it is necessary to underline a fact in which openness to experience is significant in our romantic ties, it is in our intimate relationships. A study notes that women with the highest scores in this trait more often have such relationships, While this effect was not present in men. This can mean that in marriages it is the women who decide what happens in their bedroom and with what kind of frequency, as men are ready to have more regular intimate relationships.
Responsibility is the trait that underlines our tendency to take the necessary steps to achieve medium and long term goals and exercise discipline. In romantic relationships, a high score on this trait indicates a greater likelihood of avoiding infidelities and generating well-being in married life. Likewise, people with this strongest personality trait show a propensity to avoid the risks of pregnancy and transmission of venereal diseases.
Kindness indicates the degree to which we are receptive to friendly treatment or tend to hostility. Like the trait of responsibility, it correlates positively with satisfaction in marriage, perhaps because it facilitates communication and makes it more difficult for the emergence of direct confrontations.