Human being we tend to experience what surrounds us as if it were a story.
Beyond the knowledge that describes things, as encyclopedias and textbooks do, we like to see things interpreted as stories: not something fixed and still, but something fluid and moving. Our own identity, without going further, is a set of memories of ourselves that we unconsciously encourage to give it a narrative form: from the past to the future.
Therefore, we also experience emotions as if they are story arcs. In this article we will see how to close an emotional cycle and, in this way, to be able to turn the page and give dynamism to our psychological development, avoiding stagnation.
What is the closing of an emotional cycle?
To close emotional cycles, we understand assigning a sense of completion to a stage in our life. That is to say, to feel that it had a beginning, a development and a result. However, beyond this simple definition, there is an emotional factor related to the feeling of personal development. It is not the same to feel that a stage in our life is over, to feel that it is over and also realizing that it made us better.
It is essential that at the end of emotional cycles there is reason to believe in this development and this feeling of improvement. Otherwise, it is very likely that a fear of being able to fall into the same mistakes as before will arise, since nothing has been learned from them.
The desire for accomplishment
If we aspire to close emotional cycles that give meaning to a past stage, it is because we generally do not like living together. with the tension generated by the idea that there are things pending in our lives.
This phenomenon is called the Zeigarnik effect, and it tells us that we pay more attention to those things that we think are unfinished. If what we’re trying to do is get over a phase of life that has been tinged with sadness and emotional pain in general, obsessions with the feeling of not moving forward can cause us to stagnate.
This creates a paradox: there is a will to complete this step, however over time, we believe less and less in this release. This is why closing the emotional cycle is important so as not to fall into self-fulfilling prophecy (pessimism reduces our chances of moving forward).
How to Emotionally End Stages in Our Life
To move on to another chapter in your life, follow these helpful tips for ending an emotional cycle.
1. Think about the start of the cycle
Have a clear picture of when the emotional cycle started helps identify what can cause us to shut down. For example, the appearance of a problem (illness of a loved one, dismissal, etc.).
2. Reflect on how you felt
We must go beyond the simple description of objective facts. Stop and think about your emotional reaction in this first phase of the cycle, both in positive and negative aspects.
3. Remember how you tried to move forward
At this point, remember the initiatives you have taken to move the situation forward, both in objective criteria and in those that have to do with your feelings.
4. Don’t forget your mistakes
Mistakes and failures are inherent in life, and keeping them out of our memories doesn’t help if what we want is to make them mean to us. In short, we must learn from them in order to be able to see that the most significant events of this stage have led us to a final stage in which we close the cycle.
5. Think about the direction that can lead you to close the cycle
With the things that you have in mind after going through the previous steps, it is now possible to see a trend that can cause you to close the cycle in the most positive and constructive way possible.
In the same way that a series of points can make us love a trend or a direction if we unite them together, recapping what we have been through is easy. see which finishing solutions they are more realistic and which are not.
Above all, it is important to keep the latter in mind: that it is reasonable and realistic the solution that comes to mind. In the imagination, all ideas also seem feasible, but in practice we know that their application to reality creates inequalities between these options.
6. Access the call to action
It is very difficult to close an emotional cycle just by introspection. For that, exit this phase in an action or series of actionsSo you can give it a solidity or a physical structure that shows your progress. This way, you will prove that the person who went through this emotional cycle is not exactly the same person who went out.