Our mind tends to repeat itself, to return to the known, What comforts us, to repeat behaviors which even if they hurt us we put them back into practice. It is important to know and observe yourself to know what is wrong with us and to produce healthy changes to move away from this area that makes us suffer.
Being in a vicious cycle it’s about doing the same act over and over, repeating a scene, a situation, getting the same or similar results. It causes the feeling of lack of performance, lack of alternatives, inability to choose something different. To be in a vicious cycle is to feel at a dead end.
Break with the vicious circle of the mind
“The same always happens to me”, “I’m out of luck”, “Why try if I can’t?”: These beliefs limit us and prevent us from building new paths as we grow in as people. This is usually due to low self-esteem, insecurity and self-confidence when making decisions, or bad past experiences that they interfere with the present or scare the future.
We register the discomfort and suffering and suspect that it is related to a certain situation (substance use, strenuous work, toxic relationships) but often, instead of trying to fix the problem, this discomfort paralyzes us and makes us feel complain to us., worry, confusion, feeling of emptiness. The vicious circle we are going through is invisible; we feel the unpleasant effects, but it is difficult to stop to observe and analyze the whole situation.
We complain, we suffer, we get angry, without realizing that to get out of this harmful repetition we have to make decisions that allow us to break with this circle that generates wear and tear and suffering.
Types of vicious circle
We will pose 3 forms of vicious circle. Knowing their existence will allow you to detect them and get out of their trap.
1. Turn into exhausting work
If our work does not satisfy us, does not motivate us or if we are abused, we probably have feelings of frustration, helplessness, reluctance, Lack of recognition and opportunities for professional development. This means that it is difficult for us to start the working day, that we wish that Monday did not come and that we wait with all our might for the time to flee from here.
We perceive the discomfort caused by the work we are doing or the conditions in which the work climate occurs, but if we are in the circle, we probably turn to it with complaints, anger and frustration, but without doing anything to change this situation.
Fear is a major obstacle to the decision to break this dynamic. In this case, we may be afraid to start a new job search and not find a job, afraid to find a job with more unfavorable conditions than the current ones, afraid of earning less money and living more closely. .
There is no magic or unique recipe, but one of the tools to implement in this situation is to be encouraged to make the decision to seek new employment opportunities and to set specific goals, with a deadline. For example, finding time to research job openings, using word of mouth to explain to loved ones that we are interested in getting a new job, without acting impulsively and without thinking. Making a decision takes time and takes different steps, the first of which is to be encouraged.
2. Rotation in a complicated pause
When you feel like you are embarking on the difficult process of forgetting your ex and realize that it was a relationship that was not going well on you … that desire reappears! Just at that key moment, where you remembered the negative things, you got angry, you said it was over, a message comes in or a shy and suggestive post like on Facebook and your emotional reaction to that indicates that the seed of this mental trap is still there.
You wonder why not try again, after all the relationship wasn’t that bad … Or yes, but hey, it’s easier to go back to what is known, to repeat old stories that even if we suspect the results they might have putting them together in the same way, perhaps in the hope that this time it would be different. But there’s a good chance that as long as we do the same (and let them do the same), the results will unfortunately be the same.
Probably what keeps us from breaking this circle is the fear of loneliness not being loved again, or feeling dependent on the other person, believing that without him, we cannot live well. Confusing love and need is never good.
A loving relationship is a relationship of respect, trust and freedom. Being in love is not synonymous with being enslaved. If you are feeling this, decide what is best for you, look for healthy relationships and your mind and body will appreciate it.
- Related article: “The 5 Problems of Romantic Breaks and How to Deal With Them”
3. Rotation within an addiction
Drug addiction is a health problem caused by compulsive drug use that can be addictive, both physical and psychological. The vicious circle sets in when consumption becomes disproportionate, uncontrollable, compulsive. That is, to consume in order to consume, to consume because it is necessary, because the body or the head requires it.
It is very difficult to stop using alone and almost impossible for the addict. Containment and specialized treatment are needed to be able to break this dangerous and even deadly circle.
After compulsive consumption, come the effects of abstinence, with which it becomes necessary to resume consumption. After that, the addict is likely to feel guilty, frustrated, or angry with themselves. But if the circle is not broken, after these feelings and thoughts, you can go back to consuming again and again, instead of thinking and deciding to change.
Reorienting towards a healthy lifestyle
Keep spinning over and over in a circle it does not allow us personal growth or emotional well-being. By sensing our vicious cycle, we can come out of the complaint and ask ourselves why this is happening to us, so that we can start to take a different path in a very interesting process of change.