We can all come to feel that no one can understand usThat no matter how much we express our feelings, we remain misunderstood. As a side effect, this leads to a constant feeling of loneliness. In addition, in the case of women, loneliness more often takes certain forms; traditional gender roles can lead to some forms of isolation.
like that, it is common to hear the typical phrase “I feel lonely”, Although this girl may be surrounded by people. The feeling of loneliness is irrational and does not respond to facts as they occur, but rather to a feeling of a subjective nature. In this article, we will see how to handle these situations.
Why does this feeling of loneliness appear?
We have to know how to handle this situation properly in order to get rid of the feeling of loneliness without it causing us big problems, which may not be easy at first. Once we have learned to identify the causes, we are equipped to deal with this situation.
Some people, for example, may feel lonely after their social expectations are not adequately met, Which causes them to think irrationally that the same thing will always happen and that there is no point in expressing their emotions. This is where the feeling of loneliness arises and with it the classic thought of “I feel alone”.
Having sought to respond satisfactorily to the requests of others, we usually always expect something in return. We expect the other person to make an equal effort to respond to our requests or requests. When this does not happen we feel frustrated and alone, we feel we have given more account and we have not received any compensation for it.
In the case of women, this situation may be able to do more harm. This is because the female gender tends to be more empathetic than its male counterpart, which is why the phrase “I feel lonely” is so common that women empathize but demand it too.
Most common causes of this feeling
Other possible reasons why loneliness may appear are as follows.
1. Social pressure to devote oneself to the family
Often times, when women reach the age of 30 to 40, they enter a period of reflection that leaves them wondering if the decisions they have made in their lifetime have been the best. The idea that they will no longer meet more interesting people due to social pressure to focus on the goal of starting a family it can be very harmful.
2. Personal stagnation
Worrying about not having completed personal plans is also a factor that makes women feel lonely. In general, not having children after 30 or having a stable partner are social stigmas that affect the peace of mind of many women and in many cases there is a desperate desire to meet someone special just for this reason. .
3. Superficial relationships
When our friendships are meaningless and instead are based on the superficial, feelings of loneliness will soon arise. We always need to express our feelings and hear what our real friends have to say.
4. Grieving process
The loss of a loved one it can ignite feelings of loneliness, either because of death or because you have moved to another country. Feeling the absence of this important person will imminently bring the feeling that we are left alone.
5. Too much work
If most of your life revolves around work (paid or unpaid), there is no free time left and it is difficult to build quality relationships with others. Since many women have to devote their efforts to both pursuing a career and devoting themselves to most of the household chores, this is a problem.
I feel lonely: what should be done to fix it?
The first is to recognize the emotion, to accept the fact that you feel alone and avoid falling into denial. Then identify the possible causes of your feeling of loneliness. Ask yourself: why do I feel lonely?
Now you have to act; once the emotion has been recognized and the reasons identified, the ideal is to act to change our current situation. Some things that you can do to keep the feeling of loneliness always present this way are the following activities.
1. Write a journal
It may seem like a childish resource, but it is very effective therapeutically. When you put your feelings and emotions on paper, you do it more intimatelyYou come into contact with yourself and it becomes easy for you to recognize things that can affect you on an unconscious level.
2. Avoid self-compassion
Do not feed your feeling of loneliness with complaints about yourself or others, face your situation head-on, consider that your happiness and emotional peace depend only on what you think and do. You will never be alone if you never give up on yourself, you are your inspiration to achieve the goals you have set for yourself.
3. Do meditation
Meditate 15 minutes a day for 8 weeks it can reduce negative thoughts associated with loneliness. Learning to meditate is not difficult, you don’t have to read complicated books or sign up for classes. Just sit back, close your eyes, and focus on your breathing. Don’t think about whether you are doing it right or wrong, just relax in the process.
4. Practical exercises
Exercise has many benefits for our overall health, and it goes a long way in keeping us happy thanks to the fact that when we exercise, our brain secretes dopamine (the hormone of happiness) and keeps us in contact with other people. Adopting a more cheerful attitude also makes it easier to socialize.
5. Meet new people online
The Internet is a great tool for meeting people with common interests. There are forums and group pages dedicated to hobbies, areas of study that arouse personal interest, etc.
- Larson, R .; Csikszentmihalyi, M .; Graef, R. (1982). “Time alone in the daily experience: loneliness or renewal?”. In Peplau, Letitia Anne; Perlman, Daniel. Solitude: A Book on Current Sources of Theory, Research, and Therapy. New York: John Wiley and sons. pages 41-53.
- McPherson, M .; Smith-Lovin, L .; Brashears, ME (2006). “Social Isolation in the United States: Changes in Basic Discussion Networks over Two Decades”. American sociological journal. 71 (3): 353-75.