Eduard Punset and Luis Rojas Marcos have spent years researching the elements that give meaning to happiness. A few months ago, the newspaper “El Mundo” presented a collection of interviews with various professionals who spoke of their “recipes for happiness” and among which were the reflections of these two authors.
This week, the Mensalus Institute for Psychological and Psychiatric Care tells us the recipes of Eduard Punset and Luis Rojas Marcos with the aim of extracting practical guidelines for the general public.
What is the recipe for happiness according to these authors
If you want to be happy, according to Eduard Punset:
- Do not look back.
- Find out what your article is and control it.
- Learn to share the joy and pain of others.
- Suppose you are in the smallest place in the universe. One day, humanity will want to explore everything.
- The fifth key remains to be discovered.
According to Luis Rojas Marcos, if you want to be happy:
- Analyze where you are; how would you rate your satisfaction with life.
- Think about what makes you feel good.
- Plan your life to do more.
To be happy: a pipe dream?
“Satisfaction with life” is a term Rojas Marcos commonly uses to describe happiness. What meaning can we get from it?
Talking about life satisfaction to refer to happiness is a great success. According to this psychiatrist, satisfaction is part of our instinct for self-preservation. Unconsciously, memory helps us to relativize because we are programmed to feel good and remember good.
This primitive system focuses mostly on what we do personally. In addition, it is very comforting to know that we can train you through the exercise of positive thinking and the recognition of successes, skills and personal resources among others. Life satisfaction depends in part on us and our attitude. It is up to us to promote the elements that make it possible.
How to do it will be another focus. However, positioning ourselves in action instead of contemplation, without a doubt, first gives us the areas of our own life and, with them, the privilege of feeling and enjoying it.
How to put into practice the recipes of the two authors?
Both recipes summarize titles that are useful to all and can be extrapolated to any context, which is why they become life “slogans” rather than concrete instructions on what to do to achieve happiness. Thus, these recipes can guide us to create our own recipe because there will hardly be a “magic recipe” that gives us the key to happiness.
To be more precise, if we take Eduard Punset’s recipe as an example, we see that the first point is “do not look back”. This phrase can be translated as “focus on the here and now, don’t get stuck in past messages that stray from your current reality”.
Looking back is helpful as we extract meaning and learning that provides us with useful information in the present. When looking at the past becomes an emotional burden, that is when the wings of our freedom and happiness are cut. An example of constructive thinking about the past would be:
- How many times do I look back and blame myself with a “should have done …”? (Being aware of this helps us put limits on repetitive thoughts)
- What if I can do it now that I haven’t in the past?
- What do I need to make this possible? What personal resources can help me?
These questions illustrate how we can focus on the needs of the present rather than generating ruminant thoughts around the past.
On the other hand, the recipes presented highlight the responsibility of the individual as a driver of change. Accountability is a “star ingredient” that takes shape when we answer “what can I do?” (This is when the recipe becomes a practical guide).
So, is it a question of attitude?
The “whole” is hardly true. However, attitude will condition how we see the world around us. For Rojas Marcos, talking about exact percentages is a bit risky but, leaving aside the data, we can say that our ability to be happy depends, in large part, on our stance on life. How we see ourselves and others will determine the quality of our relationships. Likewise, the quality of our relationships will condition our “degree” of happiness.
Many personal skills play a role in this. Specifically, the capacity for emotional expression is an ability that tightens bonds and allows established communication to benefit from a deeper component.
And what impact has emotional expression had on happiness throughout history?
Happiness is related to the ability to give and receive and, as we have said, emotional expression connects people on a deeper level.
In this case, Eduard Punset underlines the importance of the expression of feelings on emotional well-being and happiness, something that today occupies an important place in education (the famous Emotional Intelligence) but which, he Long ago, was considered a “nuisance” and even a limitation of one’s own strength (“crying is weak” or “expressing emotions is unnecessary”).
Thus, happiness is linked to this capacity for emotional expression, a capacity which allows the person to put names and surnames on his feelings, to share them and, thanks to this, to create bonds. Eduard Punset also connects emotional expression and new technologies. This scientist presents the technological advances of the 21st century as a tool that facilitates human relationships to a new level.
However, how to understand this new tool?
Without a doubt, technology has opened a new window of communication. Perhaps the smartest thing is knowing how to use the different channels available to us depending on the time and context in which we find ourselves, so that our needs are covered and that we find a personal and collective balance.
In short, happiness is that state of satisfaction in which we actively participate in the present by taking learning from the past and looking to the future, living each of the experiences that gives us the relationship with ourselves and with others. . Finding an exact recipe is tricky, but today we were able to see some commonalities that, adapted to who we are, position us in an active role to be happy.