Enjoyable sex through the years

Sexuality is expressed through thoughts, beliefs, fantasies, desires, attitudes, values, behaviors, practices and interpersonal relationships. But we must also understand that sexuality is a necessity and a positive factor for the person in his integral development.

However, Older people are often thought to have no sexuality., because they have undergone changes, limitations and socio-cultural barriers; thus depriving them of their right to pleasure and affection, not knowing that sexual potential can be until death, even with the functional, behavioral and psychological changes that come with aging.

    Sexuality beyond the youthful years

    The changes of aging make sexuality in older people complex and difficult to understand; apprehend sexuality as the psychological expression of emotions which requires the quality of assertive communication and a lot of confidence to share a love full of pleasure with or without sexual intercourse.

    It should be noted that at this stage of life, affectivity, affection and attention take on great importancedespite all this, sexuality in the elderly is surrounded by myths, limits and socio-cultural barriers.

    Some of them are: sexuality is reserved for young people or of childbearing age, old people lose interest in sex, old people who want to have sex are perverts, among the many obstacles that manage to limit the sexual freedom of the elderly, justifying prejudices in society and in family members. Having a conception that the older adult becomes an asexual being; however, half of them retain their sexual desire. This is due to the fact The human being is sexual from birth to death.

    Sexuality has a biological, psychological and social component; however, on many occasions, older people begin to retain the desire to express their emotions and feelings; for the fears that society and culture have imposed on him, ignoring that the expression of his sexuality plays an important role in personal satisfaction and his quality of life.

      Obstacles that make it difficult to enjoy sex

      One of the barriers to pursuing an active and healthy sex life are physiological changes and transformation; acceptance of a different body, fear and shame of not producing the same sensation, the same pleasure and the same desire in your partner.

      In women, there are significant changes such as vaginal atrophy, which results in the aging and death of cells in the intimate area and therefore a decrease in vaginal lubrication. In men, these are mainly erectile dysfunction; because due to his age, there is not enough blood circulation and he does not achieve a satisfactory erection, which inhibits and diminishes the interest in sexual intercourse.

      Communication and expression regarding tastes and interests during a sexual relationship is vitally important; recognize that sexuality is not only acquired through sexual intercourse, but that it is also formed through self-knowledge and knowledge of the body, one’s own and that of the partner.

      Another strong limitation is religion, the beliefs still maintained on sexuality have meant that many elderly people have stopped expressing their desires and especially women are unable to maintain an active sexual life; since there is the conception that his only sexual function is directed only towards procreation and not towards sexual enjoyment.

      It must be recognized that in general there are elderly people who live with relatives or are interned in various institutions, which it’s hard to get better intimacydue to the decrease in desire and attraction towards your partner, due to the prejudices created in a generational way, considering that physical contact, and not only sexual, is essential to maintain the quality of life of both.

      It has been shown that the absence of what was previously specified can lead to mental and organic diseases, not understanding that the total or partial absence of sexual relations in the couple is largely due not to lack of desire, but the opportunity to do so.

      However, the absence of a spouse, whether through loss or separation, becomes a limitation for active sexualityframed in society by beliefs and moral spheres, the latter often generates self-stimulation that leads to deterioration of the physical, psychological and mental part (diseases such as hypertension, diabetes, emotional disorders, depression, anxiety, among others), it It is possible to highlight that sexual pleasure in couples generates integral benefits in the person, even with the transformations that occur with aging.

      If it is true that during aging there are biological, social, economic and psycho-emotional changes that make sexual performance difficult, there are also functional, behavioral and psychological changes that influence sexuality, generating great barriers and limitations in the elderly when enjoying their sexuality; another of the great limits are the members of the family, since they usually have taboos with them that are often difficult to break, especially when the elderly person is widowed, since they are considered a pervert.

      The issue of housing (as noted earlier) is usually one of the significant obstacles, due to the fact that many of these elderly people live with relatives or live in geriatric homes where most of the time they sleep in beds separated even if they are married. , which limits them to pursue an active sex life.

      This does not mean that the adult will be in a constant intimate relationship; with privacy, it is intended to pursue an active sexualitywhich as mentioned before is based on physical contact: kisses, hugs, caresses, talking and caring for each other as a way to show affection.

        What can be done?

        To break with these limitations and barriers, it is necessary remove taboos that prevent older people from having a pleasurable sex life; the knowledge they have must be updated, because they are governed by misconceptions in which they consider that sexual activity should disappear with age, considering that to desire or have a sexual life after 60 is not natural, physiological, moral or socially well seen.

        Over the years there has been a generational transition in religion and culture where sex is no longer punished and being between adults there is more pleasure for the maturity one has but there is still a long way to go.

        It’s time to learn how to communicate so that when you reach this age you can enjoy pleasurable sexuality without taboos or barriers.

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