How to Tell if Toxic People Are Harming Your Mental Health The way we relate to our environment has a direct impact on our mental health, which is why building healthy and adaptive interpersonal relationships is so important.
When a relationship does not meet the most basic requirements of cohabitation and somehow affects each of its members or only one part, it is said to be a toxic relationship.
Below we will briefly see what toxic relationships are and we will see how this type of relationship can affect mental health people
What is a toxic relationship?
Toxic relationships are those in which, intentionally or not, damage to one of the parties or to both people who form the relationshipand which also generate a “vicious circle” effect which gives continuity by repeating harmful actions for one or both members.
People who are immersed in a toxic relationship, which can be a friend, partner, family or professional, usually experience feelings of anguish, pain, anxiety or stress due to their own effect and the dynamics of the relationship.
There are many types of toxic relationships, the most common and recognizable are toxic relationships in the couple, but there are also toxic relationships between friends or family that are much more difficult to detect.
Since people are different and no one is the same, this type of relationship usually has a significant impact on the mental health of the victimby alterations that can be more or less important depending on your personality and the personal psychological strategies that each one has to face adversity.
How to know if a toxic relationship is harming your mental health
Some toxic relationships can really affect the mental health of people, here we briefly present the main points of psychological impact of this type of relationship.
1. You seek constant acceptance from this person.
Constantly seeking acceptance from that particular person is usually a sign of emotional dependency, a phenomenon on which many toxic relationships are based, both with partners and with friends and family.
People who develop an emotional dependence on another person they tend to believe that their happiness is necessarily linked to the other and that they can never be happy or achieve anything except with that particular person.
In this type of dependent relationship, there is usually a dominant person who is the one who gradually induces the other to be more and more dependent on their acceptance, affection or love, a negative and very toxic dynamic.
2. You are afraid of this person
The fear that one feels towards the other is one of the essential keys to identifying toxic-type relationships.
When a relationship is based on fear and one of the people is moved by the avoidance of certain reactions on the part of the other, in the long term, it will significantly harm the mental health of those who maintain a submissive attitude.
This fear can be inspired by many reasons: for example, there can be the fear that our partner will get angry for something we do and leave us, for fear of being mistreated or for fear that he will stop loving us. .
3. You avoid conflict with this person
Avoiding any type of conflict with this person at all costs can also be seen as a clear sign of a toxic relationship; the normal thing in healthy relationships is that there are disagreements and arguments from time to timegiven that both members of the relationship maintain a certain level of autonomy and self-interest.
Doing everything possible not to argue or have conflict with this person for fear of getting angry or abandoning us is one of the classic dynamics that characterize toxic relationships.
This fear usually ends up causing, as has been indicated, that the person who feels it ends up giving in to everything and acceding to one of the requests or demands of the dominant person, to avoid any type of discussion.
4. Your self-esteem drops dramatically
In toxic relationships, it’s common for one of the people to end up developing low self-esteem by regularly dealing with someone who undermines their self-image or makes them feel bad. This psychological phenomenon may not be easy to identify often, but once identified, it is one of the most compelling pieces of evidence that we face in a toxic relationship.
Toxic people usually end up eroding the self-esteem of the person they want to dominate.so that their excesses and abuses are ignored or even a dependency is generated.
5. You feel it takes you away from your social circle
The estrangement of the victim from their social circle is another of the classic characteristics that occur in toxic relationships on the part of the toxic people who are part of them.
This social circle includes both friends and close family members and when there is a toxic relationship between the two, a gradual, conscious and active deterioration of this bond occurs. isolate the manipulated person.
6. You assume normal attempts to control yourself
Attempts at permanent control and jealousy become a daily part of toxic relationships, to the point that no one questions them. It makes the bond deteriorate quickly, porque he enters a vicious circle of control and manipulation not stopping it.
The tendency to monitor what the other person is doing all the time, to investigate their social relationships and even their mobile devices and social networks, is a sure sign of a toxic relationship between two people.
7. You blame yourself for the abuse and disrespect you suffer
Abuse and lack of respect in a relationship generate great discomfort and suffering in the person who suffers from it, and a subsequent affectation of their mental and psychological health. Now, in established toxic relationships, it is common to blame oneself for suffering this role of victim.
There are many forms of abuse and disrespect in toxic relationships, ranging from humiliation, constant teasing, to more serious forms such as sexual abuse and sexual assault.
Are you looking for psychological assistance services?
If you wish to benefit from professional psychological assistance, please contact me.
My number is Tomas Santa Cecilia and I specialize in intervention based on the cognitive-behavioral model. I can help you in person or online.
- Hewitt, JP (2009). Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology. Oxford University Press.
- Orth U.; Robbins RW (2014). The development of self-esteem. Current directions in psychological sciences. 23 (5): 381–387.